"Master, master, hurry up and go! You can't let this opportunity slip by! "
Eunuch Cao kept urging me from behind.
"What do you want me to do?"
"Do you even need to ask? Master, you're smart, but you're stupid! Of course I'm going to confess! Take advantage of the fact that the class leader's emotions aren't stable! It'll be even more effective with Gong CaiCai as a witness! "
"Confess my ass! Didn't you hear what the class leader said? She hates me! "
I directly threw the beer can at Eunuch Cao's head. I was also in a mess right now and couldn't care about protecting the environment.
Eunuch Cao shrunk his neck and the beer can brushed past him. He said with a sinister smile:
"Master, why don't you understand? Girls like the class leader always say they don't want it, but their bodies are honest! "
When he saw me glaring at him, he quickly changed his words: "Anyway, according to my years of experience playing H games, master, if you go out now, give the class leader a hug in front of Gong CaiCai, explain the misunderstanding, and say a few mushy words, the class leader will basically fall!"
"Huh? How do you know the class leader misunderstood me? "Eunuch Cao wasn't around when we were rubbing against each other because of the zipper.
"I don't know! But, in order to win over the class leader, I have to make it sound like a misunderstanding! "
"You're saying it like I really want to win over the class leader …"
Eunuch Cao rolled his shifty eyes, "Master, don't you want to? Someone like the class leader, who's usually independent and majestic, not only would she have to act like a helpless little bird after being won over by master, but she would also have to toss and turn under master's body as a former Justice Devil … I can't even think about it, Yiku … "
Don't imitate the lines of an AV actress! I never thought of that step! Although Iron Blood Lone Wolf has been wronged by the Justice Devil many times, I never thought of getting revenge! Why does it sound like a plot from H manga, criminal XX female police officer!
"Who is it? Who's hiding in the bushes! "
Even though there was a lot of noise outside, the class leader still discovered our existence.
She immediately looked in the direction we were hiding. Obama also took advantage of the situation and rushed forward a few steps. He stretched the leash in the class leader's hand.
Although she wasn't wearing a police uniform, she looked like a policewoman with a police dog!
Obama seems to be more obedient under the class leader's guidance than when he was in Ai Mi's hands. The class leader didn't waste her time reading the Dog Breeding Handbook.
"Come out now! Otherwise, I'll let the dogs bite you! "
The class leader immediately regained her usual calmness and sternness when the other party's identity was unknown. She loosened the leash and threatened.
Gong CaiCai hid behind the class leader when she heard there was someone hiding in the bushes.
"It's, it's a tiger! It must be a tiger coming to eat me! "
Gong CaiCai still remembered what Xiong YaoYue had said to her on the mountainside.
Obama suddenly stopped barking.
When Obama heard Gong CaiCai say that there might be a tiger in the bushes, he immediately stopped barking.
What the f * ck! You've become a demon! Are you scared just because you heard that there might be a tiger? Not only did she stop screaming, but she also hid behind the class leader like Gong CaiCai. Do you want the class leader to use her own body to fight the tiger for you?
The class leader wasn't Loud Mouth and there wasn't much space behind her. Obama thought Gong CaiCai was a hindrance, so he barked twice to scare her away.
Thus, the husky occupied the position behind the class leader with a clear conscience. It only peeked its head out from the side of the class leader's calf to see if there was a tiger in the bushes.
"Beat … up …" Gong CaiCai, who had nowhere to hide, said a single word like a password with her trembling lips.
Damn, are you going to turn into a magical girl? She signed a contract with an alien creature from the Scientific Happiness Church and turned into a magical girl without anyone knowing. So Professor Bai's real body is a QB.
"Uncle … uncle …"
Huh? Why are you calling me uncle again? Xiao Ding from the pet hospital once said that when the World of Warcraft expansion was delayed many times, there were a lot of 'uncle cliques' that said their uncle worked at Jiucheng or NetEase and knew the inside story … but that was a long time ago. Even if Gong CaiCai's uncle worked at NetEase, he wouldn't be able to fight a tiger.
At the very least, it would have to be Wu Song who worked at Liangshan Lake and went to Jingyang Ridge. Could it be that Wu Song is your uncle?
Um … uncle it is, at least it's better than Wu Song being your uncle. Otherwise, your father would be Wu Dalang and your mother would be Pan Jinlian.
Of course, your father could also be Ximen Qing …
"Uncle … uncle … save me!!"
Gong CaiCai used all her strength to yell at the top of her lungs.
But because she was too scared, her voice wasn't even as loud as the stream.
So you were yelling for help. You're so timid that you can't even yell for help. If you were kidnapped by bad guys, they wouldn't even need to gag your mouth.
As expected, you're not suited to survive in this dangerous society. Being a magical girl is your only way out. Gong CaiCai, you were born in the wrong dimension. Our world is at most a campus urban novel. You can only be the female lead in a magical fantasy novel.
For example, blah blah blah blah blah …
"Don't be afraid, there won't be any tigers in the mountains." The class monitor said calmly. She wasn't surprised that Gong CaiCai was too scared to make a sound, but Obama, as a big dog, actually used her as a shield. She never expected that.
"My name is Shu Sha. I never expected to have such a big dog …"
I automatically imagined the class leader to use the tone of Wang Dachui from the popular online drama Unexpectedly! to say the self-introduction.
"Xiao Ba." The class leader took the initiative to give Obama this nickname, "Don't embarrass the Husky. You can smell with your nose and you'll know there aren't any tigers in the bushes. Be braver, I'll feed you beef when we get back …"
There's no way an idiot dog like the Husky can be embarrassed. Also, are you sure Obama can understand such a complicated sentence?
Damn it, he actually understood it. Not only did he understand the word 'tiger', but he also understood such a long sentence. After the class leader's reminder, he stuck his nose out and sniffed the air. When he realized there wasn't any smell of large cats, he immediately became arrogant. He once again stood in front of the class leader with an imposing aura of 'Thousands of troops and horses, who else but me can do it'.
You're so arrogant! You're so dumb that you even forgot your sense of smell. Also, did a piece of beef bribe you? Did the three hundred Spartan warriors guard Hot Spring Pass for roast beef?
If I didn't come out, the class leader might increase the price (for example, give Obama a leg of lamb). If Obama was blinded by greed and charged into the bushes to bite, then Eunuch Cao and I would have eight lifetimes of bad luck.
"Class leader, don't shoot, it's me."
I stuck my head out from the bushes with my hands raised. I don't know why, but I said 'don't release the dog' instead of 'don't shoot'. Also, I almost blurted out 'the Imperial Army told me to bring you a message'.
The class leader's face immediately turned red. The color of her face echoed with the stream water and almost formed the poem "Round Sunset on the Long River".
She bit her lips and stared at me as if she wanted to gouge out my flesh. Her hand that was holding the leash was trembling.
"You … when did you hide in there?"
She finally asked. She looked calm on the outside, but she was extremely nervous on the inside as she waited for my answer.
"Ah … it's not a tiger …" Gong CaiCai's legs went soft from the fright and she sat paralyzed on a pebble by the river.
I thought about it carefully. If I said I was hiding in the bushes from the beginning and heard the entire conversation, then it would not only make me seem ungentlemanly, but it would also make the class leader feel extremely awkward.
Thus I coughed and pointed at Eunuch Cao, who was trying to get away with lowering his head.
"I just came over because Eunuch Cao wanted to take a dump. He was afraid of snakes, so he begged me to come over and accompany him. Look — — he still hasn't taken off his pants! "
The class leader revealed a disgusted expression. Of course, which girl likes to watch a guy (especially someone like Eunuch Cao) take a dump!
I kicked Eunuch Cao, "Hurry up and take it off! Didn't you say you were about to shit your pants? "
Eunuch Cao might have been afraid the class leader would notice the miniature camera in his hand, so he didn't hesitate to take off his pants in order to save his life. He revealed his butt that was whiter than the moon — — damn, I'm not going to admire the moon on August 15th this year!
"Um … Ha … Wu …"
Eunuch Cao snorted as if he was constipated.
The class leader immediately turned her gaze away and said angrily: "Didn't we find a public toilet when we went up the mountain? Even though it's a bit old and it's a few minutes away from the top, you guys should still go there! "
"Eunuch Cao couldn't hold it in anymore." I said, "Also, isn't it a pile of natural fertilizer if he pees under the tree?"
Actually, I think Eunuch Cao himself is a pile of natural fertilizer and should be buried under the tree.
The class leader covered her nose and led Obama away. Obama, on the other hand, had a very interested expression.
As expected, a dog can't change its spots!
I helped up Gong CaiCai who had weak legs and the two of us and a dog returned to the campsite at the top of the mountain.
But before we left, I glanced at the bushes out of the corner of my eye. Based on my expression, it was like I was trying to confirm if I was lying or if I overheard the conversation between me and Gong CaiCai.
I pretended to be disgusted by the smell and purposely ignored the class leader's gaze. I fanned my nose.
The class leader walked away with suspicion while looking back every few steps.
I let out a sigh of relief and thought that I finally got through the crisis. But I didn't know when, but the stench I pretended to smell actually appeared right under my nose.
Eunuch Cao raised his head from the bushes and said with a pained expression: "Master, can you bring me a piece of paper?"
Damn, the act turned into reality! Who told you to actually poop here!
"It's not my fault." Eunuch Cao said with a grievance, "I already ate a lot, and master, you made me squat here. The feeling came as soon as I took off my pants, what could I do!"
"I didn't bring any paper, I'll use leaves!"
After leaving Eunuch Cao in the bushes, I returned to the campsite at the top of the mountain. I found that the class leader fulfilled her promise and was feeding Obama roast beef.
Her expression seemed happy, but her eyes were as lonely as snow. Every time we accidentally made eye contact, she would immediately look away with a rare expression of resentment.
Looking at Xiong YaoYue who was eating and drinking without a care in the world, I felt that it wouldn't be good for the class leader to misunderstand. Let's not talk about whether Xiong YaoYue is my girlfriend or sister, but I should explain to the class leader that we're just bros.
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