In his own living room, Uncle Fireball did not show any sign of fear despite being surrounded by the three of us and forced to open the package in front of him.
Instead, his expression was filled with pride and disdain.
He handed the package to me and said: "If you're interested in the contents, then open it yourself!"
Huh? He's so confident, is it not lubricant or intestine scrubber, but a parcel bomb? Will it explode as soon as I open it?
Also, I heard that some people in the online store business would mail feces to a buyer who gave a bad review so they would feel disgusted for half a year as soon as they touched it.
In order to prevent the contents from being bombs or feces, I passed the package to Fan Chuan and said:
"You open it. The sooner you confirm what's inside, the sooner you can decide if you want to PK with Uncle Fireball in real life."
Fan Chuan glared at Uncle Fireball. He did not use scissors or a utility knife, he directly tore open the tape on the package with his bare hands.
"Don't break it," Uncle Fireball reminded coldly.
"What? Do you plan on using the things inside? "Fan Chuan made a disgusted expression," Why does Xiao Hong have a perverted uncle like you! "
But as the package was opened, Fan Chuan was stunned. Xiao Ding was also stunned when he saw what was inside.
Huh? Don't block me, let me take a look! What is it? Is it a time bomb that's counting down! Or is it a time bomb with a pile of feces on top, once it explodes, it will scatter everywhere and no one will be able to avoid it?
Damn, the seller, you're too cruel! How many bad reviews did Uncle Fireball give you!
I stretched my neck to take a look, but I saw an Apple iPad lying inside the package. The white packaging was simple and prominent, it let people know what was inside with a glance.
"That … Although it's an apple box, could there be something else inside?" Xiao Ding voiced his opinion.
"Then you might as well open the packaging too!" Uncle Fireball snorted, "But this is a gift for my nephew, if you break it, you have to pay for it!"
I picked up the plastic packaging of the iPad and weighed it in my hand. I felt its weight and made a judgment in my heart.
"There's nothing else inside. It should be a tablet computer. This weight doesn't seem to be lubricant …"
Uncle Fireball sneered and mocked, "Ye Lin, you're pretty professional in selling adult products. You can tell if it's an adult toy just by weighing it with your hand. "
Who would be so professional! I only used the iPad that Ai Mi casually threw in the RV, so I was familiar with its weight.
"You pervert, what's the meaning of buying an iPad for Lil 'Red?" Fan Chuan was very confused, and he was still looking at Uncle Fireball coldly.
"You're someone who thinks about marrying a trap every day. What right do you have to call me a pervert?" Uncle Fireball retorted. "I haven't seen my nephew for two years. What's wrong with buying him a gift? In the past few days, I heard from him that he likes Apple products … "
With a squeak, Shu Zhe's bedroom door was opened from the inside. Shu Zhe, who hadn't had time to change out of the maid costume, only took off the cat ears and cat tail underwear. He wiped his tears and walked out.
"What? So uncle didn't want to … "
Shu Zhe, who still had the appearance of a delicate girl, made Fan Chuan and Xiao Ding's hearts tremble. Their faces, which were cold to Uncle Fireball just now, unknowingly softened.
Although Uncle Fireball was used to seeing his nephew like this these days, in front of Fan Chuan and Xiao Ding, the two pursuers, Shu Zhe seemed to be even more feminine. Uncle Fireball didn't know where to look, so he could only try to look away.
"At first, I was really angry at you, but after thinking about it carefully, I can't blame you entirely. You've been wronged for the past few days. I'm giving you this tablet as an apology … Don't tell your sister and your parents!"
Are you trying to bribe me with a gift? Uncle Fireball, you should learn from America and use the stick and carrot approach.
Shu Zhe saw that the gift was still in my hands, so he impatiently took a step forward and snatched the iPad from my hands.
Shu Zhe tore off the plastic seal and opened the packaging. After seeing the milky white body lying in the box, Shu Zhe pouted and said: "Why is it only a third generation iPad. The newest one is already the fourth generation. "
Don't be dissatisfied. Even a third generation iPad costs around ¥2500. Thinking back to when my dad bought me a three hundred yuan MP4 as a birthday present, I was quite happy!
"Anyway, you can use it first." Uncle Fireball scratched the short hair on the back of his head in embarrassment, "Although it seems like you want an iPhone 5s, your phone is still new, so I bought you an iPad for you to play with. When your current phone breaks …"
Shu Zhe's eyes flashed with surprise as if he suddenly realized that his uncle was able to buy a lot of gifts for him since he retired due to illness and received a large amount of disability pension.
In the blink of an eye, she saw that the phone she had bought for less than three months was placed next to the bottle of Wuliangye on the dining table. She ignored the fact that she was wearing a dress and quickly took the phone into her hand. Then, she pretended to let the phone slip out of her hand, hoping that it would shatter on the hard tile floor.
Where's your integrity? After 28 Middle allowed students to bring cell phones with them, you gave your older sister your old cell phone, and then your older sister bought you a new cell phone!
But when I heard your uncle say that he would buy you an iPhone 5s after your phone is worn out, you couldn't wait to smash your phone in front of everyone! Do you really want an iPhone 5s that badly?
Fortunately, I was already prepared. When Shu Zhe went to the dining table to grab the phone, I was right behind him. I happened to catch the phone in my hand and it didn't break.
Hmph, gramps Ren's Yin Yang Sanshou can catch people falling from a high altitude. Even though I'm not strong enough and have a heart condition, I can still catch a phone.
"Bro Ye Lin, you …" Shu Zhe wanted to get angry at me after I ruined his plans.
Eh? Did you eat a leopard's guts? Do you think Fan Chuan, Xiao Ding, and your uncle all like you and have someone backing you up, so you can glare at me?
You can't encourage him! I was so angry that I wanted to give Shu Zhe a knock on the head. He immediately closed his eyes and made a nervous expression similar to when I flicked Gong CaiCai's head.
Fan Chuan and Xiao Ding immediately stood in front of Shu Zhe like summoned beasts.
"What do you want to do to my Xiao Hong? How could you hit someone so cute!? "
"Xiao Ye, don't … don't hit Xiao Hong, she didn't break her phone on purpose …"
Who said she didn't do it on purpose! It's fine if Fan Chuan is dead set on her, but Xiao Ding also fell for her! You've been in contact with the class leader at the pet hospital, yet you didn't fall for her, but instead fell for her brother!
Shu Zhe hid behind Fan Chuan and Xiao Ding. When no one else could see, he stuck out his tongue at me.
What an ungrateful thing! If I knew earlier, I wouldn't have come to save you! If I knew earlier, I would have let Uncle Fireball burst your ass!
Wait, it seems that Uncle Fireball didn't plan on bursting Shu Zhe's ass, this delivery is proof.
But even if he didn't plan on doing it today, it doesn't mean he won't do it in the future! Uncle Fireball, look at Shu Zhe wearing female clothing and using the identity of 'Xiao Hong' to seek protection behind Fan Chuan and Xiao Ding. It seems like there's a trace of jealousy in his eyes!
While Shu Zhe was studying the new iPad and Fan Chuan and Xiao Ding were trying to please him, I called Uncle Fireball to the side and whispered to him:
"What do you mean by buying a gift for Shu Zhe? Don't tell me you want to have a long-term relationship with Shu Zhe and let him be your 'friend'?! "
"Fuck, who would be friends with their nephew!" Uncle Fireball said angrily, "I'm just giving a gift to a junior!"
"Nonsense!" I frowned, "You haven't seen Shu Sha in a long time, why are you only giving a gift to your nephew and not your niece?"
Other than suspecting Uncle Fireball's motives, I also felt a bit unfair for the class leader.
"I never said I wasn't going to give Shu Sha a gift!" Uncle Fireball complained, "It's just that I know Shu Sha isn't a big fan of electronics, so I was planning on giving her a few high-class shoes!"
As a girl, the class leader didn't have enough shoes. Uncle Fireball wanted to buy shoes for the class leader, so it was like using good steel on a blade's edge.
"Wait!" I asked again, "Don't tell me you're planning on personally accompanying Shu Sha to the mall and peeking at her feet when she's trying them on! You're a lolicon! "
"Who's planning that!" Uncle Fireball was furious, "I'm not that perverted! But you're probably interested in my niece's feet! You perverted foot maniac! "
I was a bit guilty and speechless. A few days ago at the hotel at the foot of Cuisong Mountain, I did use the class leader's bare feet for a bad purpose.
"As for buying shoes for Shasha, I will ask my wife to accompany her!" Uncle Fireball said solemnly, "I know I'm a bit of a lolicon, so I won't give myself too many chances to be alone with Shu Sha! I will also ask my wife to buy some shoes with high heels for Shasha, and to make her look prettier … "
"Hey, Shu Sha is already very tall. If you want to buy shoes for her, just buy shoes. Why did you specifically choose shoes with high heels? What are you plotting? "
"Um …" This time it was Uncle Fireball's turn to feel guilty, "I was just thinking that since the heels are high, I won't be able to run as fast …"
"Fuck, you pervert! You're still thinking about Shu Sha, aren't you? Do you think you'll be able to catch up to Shu Sha easily if she wears those shoes? "
"Ye Lin, shut up! I only have the love an uncle has for his niece, an elder has for a junior, and a hunter has for a little hunter! "Uncle Fireball lectured me righteously, then he licked his dry lips:
"I hope Shu Sha wears shoes that aren't suitable for running, I just … I just want to prevent my niece from catching up to me if I lose control one day and push Shu Zhe …"
You're still saying you're not a pervert! You're still trying to push Shu Zhe! Are you trying to bribe him with gifts in hopes that one day he'll willingly be pushed by you?
I can't take it anymore! There are a total of five men in this room, but Shu Zhe doesn't look like a man at all, and the other three men want to push Shu Zhe down!
I'm already in despair in this world where everyone wants to push traps!
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