After I put the metal box that Huo ZhenBang gave Xiao Qin's birthday present back home, I felt a bit restless as I held the two tickets.
This thing is definitely illegal, right? Since it's called an "underground" boxing match, then it definitely doesn't use normal fighting rules. I'm afraid that when the contestants fight, they will beat their opponent to death. It's basically like the "death fights" that Peng TouSi participated in.
China is really keeping up with the times! I originally thought that these ancient Roman arenas would only exist in capitalist countries like America and Russia, or Thailand with its Muay Thai tradition. I didn't expect that in China, after karaoke, bars, and casinos, it became a way for the rich to release their stress!
Although I knew from the bottom of my heart that these underground matches that treat human life like grass are not in line with universal values, I couldn't help the impulse in my heart when I saw the sandbag hanging in my bedroom. I quickly threw two straight punches at the sandbag.
"Bang, bang" sounds came from the rough sandbag, as if it was the drumbeat before the start of a battle in an ancient Roman arena.
I'm really curious about unrestricted fighting without rules, I really want to see it with my own eyes!
This is a tournament that gave birth to someone as strong as Peng TouSi! It's not easy to get a chance to observe, if I don't go just because it's illegal, then I'd be too unmanly!
Once I made up my mind, my heart itched. Although Huo ZhenBang told me that the underground matches would be held in Dong Shan city for a week, I was like a healthy teenager who just downloaded an AV and didn't have the patience to wait until the weekend to enjoy it.
I want to go today since Xiao Qin's birthday is tomorrow.
The second ticket was very easy to decide.
Of course it was to invite Peng TouSi! The former undefeated champion of the underground boxing competition, the legendary figure known as the "Black Death God". With him explaining from the side, I can definitely learn more combat skills!
I immediately called Peng TouSi. It just so happened that Ai Mi had enough people, so she generously "lent" Peng TouSi to me and even sent her personal car.
After the sky darkened, I sat in the luxurious Batmobile and was escorted by Peng TouSi. We arrived outside an unused warehouse on the outskirts. I felt a strong sense of unreality as I looked at the various cars parked around.
"Underground matches … I didn't think I would miss them a bit."
Peng TouSi looked at the night sky outside the window and smiled bitterly.
"But, isn't Dong Shan city's organizer too unprofessional? How could they give out tickets for an underground fight? In the United States, people use Facebook to post information about the competition in code words and immediately delete it after ten seconds. "
"This … Maybe it's because China can't access Facebook, so they could only give out tickets?" I made an irresponsible guess.
"Isn't there still Sina Weibo?" Peng TouSi pointed out as he switched off the engine.
In front of a China expert like Peng TouSi, I couldn't raise my head.
Dong Shan city secretly organized this underground boxing tournament. It was unknown which local gangster came up with the Feng Feng Gang, but from start to finish, it gave off the vibe of a pirated gang. The invited audience didn't look like rich people, but rather, there were quite a few drunkards, hooligans, and at most two nouveau riche.
This … Even though the venue was remote, the facilities were simple, and the average quality of the audience wasn't high, there should still be some experts participating, right? It's not like the toughest environment creates the greatest warriors, it should be like this!
The people in charge of checking tickets at the warehouse entrance were two men that looked like soldiers. Peng TouSi stood in front of them and scared the two of them until their faces turned white.
"Do … do you have tickets?" Soldier A stuttered.
I walked up from behind Peng TouSi and handed him the two tickets.
When Miscellaneous Soldier B received the ticket, he shivered and almost dropped the ticket on the ground.
"Go, go in!"
The torn tickets were casually thrown on the ground — — fuck, you're a spy from the Public Security Bureau! Are you afraid the police won't be able to find us?
"That's too unprofessional, too unprofessional …"
Peng TouSi shook his head. When I told him I had two tickets, he was shocked that someone dared to print the address of the match on the tickets. Even though it was a watermark that could only be seen through sunlight, it still made him feel like it was unreliable.
I took a deep breath after entering the warehouse.
How crude, what a crude concrete platform! It was built crookedly in the middle of the warehouse with a few pillars and then a rope ring around it. It reminded me of my clay art homework when I was in fourth grade!
The audience seats were also extremely shabby, all of them were folding chairs that were bought wholesale from Taobao. They were arranged in four directions and it was extremely uncomfortable sitting on them. I already felt like I was going to suffer from varicose veins and lumbar muscle strain at such a young age, let alone other people?
Can there be a limit to how many knockoffs there are? This feeling, it's like when someone lands on the moon with a spaceship and we tie four legs to the legs of a chair and travel to outer space!
Because Peng TouSi was with me, the organizer mistook him as my bodyguard, so we were invited to the VIP seats.
Actually, if they didn't say it, I really wouldn't have been able to tell that the west side was the VIP seats. From what I see, it's the difference between a ¥16 chair and a ¥12 chair.
But … there will be experts, right? They say there are crouching tigers hidden deep in the mountains and dragons hidden in the busy city. Even though the arena and audience seats are broken, there will still be experts, right? I have to have confidence! Weren't Zhuge Liang and Zhao Benshan dug out from the village!
Peng TouSi and I sat in the first row of the VIP seats. Sitting on our right was a salesman uncle with a slanted tie. He didn't have a lot of hair on his head and had a dispirited expression. He seemed to have drunk a lot before coming here.
"Huh? You're gambling at such a young age? "The salesman uncle looked at me with his neck stretched across Peng TouSi.
"Gambling?" I didn't understand.
"Underground fights often have audience bets, it's also one of the important sources of income," Peng TouSi explained.
Hearing Peng TouSi speak Chinese, the salesman uncle was shocked.
"Damn! This black bro is so fluent in Chinese! "
"You flatter me." Peng TouSi said modestly, "I only know how to speak and not write."
"That's still amazing! Oh yeah, if you two need housing resources, you can come find me at Lian Family Real Estate. Everyone calls me 'Old Mao', this is my business card … "
What a strong professionalism! Don't you know that underground fights are illegal, the ratio of good people in this warehouse is very low! There might even be undercover police! Are you just going to hand out your business card so casually!
In comparison, Peng TouSi was much more cautious. He introduced himself: "I'm Peng Peng, my family's young master's bodyguard."
Then he pointed at me, "This is my family's young master, he's called … Lin Ye. We're not going to bet, we're just here to watch."
Looking at Peng TouSi's robust physique and my ferocious appearance, Old Mao's eyes showed a split second of fear, but the alcohol got to his head and he started to talk.
"Hey, hey, Young Master Lin, and Mr. Peng, it sounds like you guys are from the underworld!"
Peng TouSi nodded: "You flatter me."
Flatter my ass! I bluntly admitted it!
There aren't any undercover police nearby, right? I just came to observe unrestricted fighting techniques, I don't want to be caught as a member of the underworld and lose my soap!
Old Mao burped, his loose facial muscles were filled with a strange smile caused by alcohol poisoning.
"Underworld people … It doesn't matter if you're from the underworld! Underworld people are also people, they need to live in a house and buy a house! Find me if you need anything! It's a small world … Burp! "
"Mr. Old Mao, is this your first time watching a match?" Peng TouSi tried to worm information out of Old Mao.
"Don't, don't call me Mr.! The customer is God! Just call me Old Mao! " Old Mao continued to act crazy under the influence of alcohol, "The tickets were … sold to me by Old Li, he said it's more fun than the black lottery … I'm going to gamble to my heart's content today!"
Damn, the tickets to the underground match can be bought from a book stall like a game point card … Just how gutsy is the organizer, or how little common sense does he have!
But even if the organizer is an idiot, there should be experts on the field, right? Everyone was here to watch this. If there were no experts competing, no one would bet so enthusiastically. That should be the case, right?
"Wuwuwu …" Old Mao suddenly started crying again.
"Damn you, Xiao Wang, you actually stole my old …"
Did he steal your wife? Did you come to the underground match to vent your anger because your wife ran away with someone else? What a bitter salesman!
I didn't expect Old Mao to continue: "… You actually stole my old customer! The 2 million deal had also been snatched away! Xiao Wang, your son doesn't have an asshole! "
So it was an internal competition among the salesmen? It's the old customer that was stolen, not the wife, that should be something to be happy about, right?
At this time, someone pushed a cart to sell drinks and snacks, it was as expensive as the ones on the train. Peng TouSi and I each took a can of tomato juice, which cost 20 yuan per can.
"Selling tomato juice in an underground match that's filled with blood and sweat, I really don't understand what the organizer is thinking," I ridiculed.
If it wasn't for Peng TouSi strongly recommending that tomato juice contains active enzymes that can strengthen muscles, I wouldn't have drunk it.
"Why aren't you starting yet!" Someone shouted from the seats on the east side.
At this time, just like in a movie, the lights were turned off, and a spotlight shone on the center of the stage like lightning. A host wearing a yellow striped suit and bow tie appeared on the stage.
"Everyone, please calm down, the exciting match is about to begin!"
I don't know why, but I always felt that the host had some characteristics of a comedian.
"Huh? Isn't this the host that Boss Qian hired for his wedding? "
Old Mao suddenly said.
What the fuck is going on! Are they going to carry on the road to the end! An underground match is such a serious and cruel thing, they actually hired a wedding host to be the host, they should at least hire a sports commentator!
"You and I are fated to meet in the secular world. I hope that we can continue this fate and continue to watch our competition!"
"This event is jointly sponsored by China Central Television, the United Arab Emirates, and the Alien Competition Center!"
"Next, let's invite the first pair of contestants to have a warm-up match. Let's watch them fight it out and have a son soon … No, it's a hundred years of happiness … No … Anyway, please give a round of applause!"
Can't you first string out the lyrics before you host the match! It's all the same stuff you do at weddings, who wants to listen to your corny jokes!
Huh? Music started playing around! I didn't hear wrong, it's the theme song from Rocky 1! Because of the darkness, everyone's eyes were focused on the stage, ignoring the simple facilities around it. This way, it's quite an atmosphere!
The host generously waved his arm, "First, let me introduce the male … No, the red contestant — —"
"Mr. Itozoe, a ninth-dan Kyokushin Karate master from Japan!"
The background music suddenly changed to "Japanese Invading the Village", and a "Japanese" with a medium build and a small mustache on his lips swaggered onto the stage.
"Oh, oh — —" The audience cheered. In terms of hatred, China was really at the forefront of gangsters and ruffians.
"Hello, everyone!" Ito Etsuki said to the audience in a very fake Japanese accent, "Our Japanese Karate is the best in the world! I will definitely be the final victor! "
It was too fake! Before pretending to be a Japanese, you should first change your Shandong accent!
Amidst the laughter and curses of the audience, the host began to introduce the Blue Team contestant. Luckily, he didn't say she was the "female" this time. Otherwise, the two of them could have consummated their marriage.
"The blue team contestant is Mr. Lee Yong Gil, a 9th Dan Taekwondo black belt from Korea!"
That was even more fake! Young master Xu the panty thief, his father, Xu Jinsheng, was only an 8th Dan black belt. It was said that there were only 3 9th Dan black belts in the world, and all of them were Koreans. They were all between 70 and 80 years old. What was up with this man who looked less than 40 years old?
In addition, when "Korean" Lee Yong Ji went on stage, the music changed to the theme song of "Dae Jang Geum". Furthermore, it was the version with lyrics.
"Wu Dalang, Wu Dalang ~ ~ ~ I got beaten by a pig ~ ~ ~ I got beaten by a pig ~ ~ ~ I got beaten by a pig ~ ~ ~ ~"
F * ck, I'm going to spray tomato juice all over your faces! Is this still the underground match of blood and fire in my mind? Finding two fake foreigners to entertain the public, wasn't this on the same level as a rural striptease show that was often held in the countryside?
The music for "Dae Jang Geum" finally stopped playing, and Wu Dalang no longer had to be beaten by a pig. The fake Korean, Lee Young Gil, took the microphone and announced to the audience,
"Our Korean Taekwondo is the strongest Seumida! Furthermore, Confucius and Jesus were both Koreans! The universe was created by us Koreans, Seumida! "
Peng TouSi and I sat up straight and were about to vomit blood.
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