The Church of Scientific Happiness's ultimate weapon, the extremely mysterious' causality calculation 'program, was installed on an ordinary laptop.
It was said that after the discussion and Q&A, the resulting data package had to be uploaded to a giant computer for calculation. If it was an ordinary computer, it would take at least half a year to get the results.
After the lecture, Professor Bai (he introduced himself as Bai before the lecture) had the three of us stay behind as if he wanted to use his ultimate weapon to conquer us. Although in my opinion, teacher Hu and Gong CaiCai were almost completely conquered.
According to tradition, the order in which they joined the seminar was determined, so the first person to enjoy the 'prediction' was teacher Hu, followed by Gong CaiCai, and finally me.
Professor Bai used the reason of 'eliminating as much interference as possible' to talk to the three of us one by one. This was also the usual method of the cult, so I wasn't surprised.
After everyone dispersed, teacher Hu excitedly sat in the first row of the classroom, while Professor Bai fiddled with his laptop on the podium with an expression of a swindler.
I peeked at the laptop screen.
It's a fucking white screen! Do you have any professional ethics? Even a crystal ball on the table would be better than a laptop with a white screen!
Professor Bai seemed to have guessed what I was thinking. He smiled and said, "I'm sorry. For the sake of confidentiality, the laptop screen of the seminar is specially processed. Only special contact lenses can see the content. Otherwise, it will be a white screen."
It's really high-tech. I think I've seen a computer screen that uses the principle of polarized light for confidentiality on the website of the Science Squirrel Society. It seems there are no flaws in Professor Bai's explanation …
In order to ensure that Professor Bai and teacher Hu were alone and to create an environment similar to that of a psychiatrist, Gong CaiCai and I were chased to a bench in the hallway.
I have to say, it was quite boring to be alone with Gong CaiCai, especially in an old office building where people often pass by.
If I was with her, she would talk about all kinds of 'fantasies' after marriage. Although it was very off-key, it wasn't boring.
If I was with the class leader, it would be a moral lesson about 'ideals' and 'responsibility'. Actually, I especially liked to argue and see the class leader's face turn red when she couldn't refute me.
I felt the most relaxed when I was with Xiong YaoYue. I basically got along with a guy, and her knowledge of sports and games left me in awe.
As for Gong CaiCai, she simply answered every question. It was unknown if it had anything to do with the "future prediction" that she was about to receive from Professor Bai. In short, she seemed very nervous, causing the glasses on the bridge of her nose to slide down every few minutes.
"Gong CaiCai, is there a religious person in your family?" I asked casually.
Actually, it was not particularly random. Many of the lost lambs who mistakenly entered a cult had parents who were fanatical believers of a certain religion. After all, it was much easier to get a theist to join a cult than an atheist.
"Hmm … Dad would pray to Guan Yu when he was discussing business," Gong CaiCai said after thinking for a while. "Also, I heard from my aunt that my mother prayed to Guanyin, who gave birth to me …"
This was a typical Chinese belief that was cramming at the last minute. It was equivalent to having no belief at all! It looks like the root cause wasn't Gong CaiCai's parents. Maybe Gong CaiCai was easily influenced by her teacher, and Mr. Hu, who had been tutoring her in math, was the main culprit that led her to a cult.
While we were talking, Gong CaiCai was using her iPhone 4 to browse the website of an animal conservation organization. She looked at koalas and baby pandas to relieve the pressure of facing her future.
"National treasure pandas are so lucky!" I commented, "If you reincarnate as a panda, you don't have to do anything, you just roll on the ground and someone will bring you food. The living conditions are better than 90% of the Chinese …"
Gong CaiCai was stunned for a moment as if she was imagining herself as a panda (She used to say her dream was to become a scallop). At first, her gaze was blurry and dreamy, but she suddenly shook her head.
"No, no! I can't be a good panda! I have to be seen by people every day! I'll be so embarrassed that I won't be able to lift my head! "
What, you don't even have the confidence to be a casual job like a panda? You don't have enough shame to be seen by people every day? Let me tell you, as a panda, you have to watch panda porn every day after you become an adult and shoulder the glorious mission of producing more offspring!
At this moment, teacher Hu walked out of the classroom with a face full of joy. When he saw us, he said to us as if he was eager to share his joy:
"It's too effective! It's really the same as what everyone said! It's too effective! "
"Professor Bai actually calculated that I wanted to invest in a stock, and he even calculated that I wanted to buy a solar company's stock! I've never told anyone! "
"His calculations also showed that there's an 80% chance that I'll be stuck in this stock, that was so dangerous! I'll listen to professor Bai and use this money on a more reliable investment! "
"Is it really that effective?"
Next was Gong CaiCai's turn. She asked with both anticipation and worry.
"It's definitely effective!" Teacher Hu's excitement had yet to subside, he gave a thumbs up in an exaggerated manner, "This is only the result of a shallow prediction. When I earn money in the future, I'll definitely do a deeper prediction!"
I didn't think much of it. First of all, I couldn't rule out the possibility that Teacher Hu was a scammer. Secondly, I understood how the Scientific Happiness Sect made money.
Everyone always had a respectful and fearful attitude towards the future. If one could predict their future by spending money, it would definitely attract rich and idle people to donate money with both hands.
I don't believe that the prediction of losing money was calculated through a program! In China's stock market, the chances of individual investors getting stuck is already over 80%! If they could really predict the rise and fall of the stock market, why would they need to hold a conference to trick people? They could just invest in stocks and they would definitely become the second generation of Buffett!
Teacher Hu said that professor Bai was currently uploading information to the backup server, so Gong CaiCai had to wait for ten minutes before she could enter. At this moment, Gong CaiCai's iPhone 4 emitted a low battery notification.
Even though Gong CaiCai had set her phone to silent mode during class so that she wouldn't disturb others, the iPhone 4's low battery warning tone would still ring even after she turned it on silent mode.
"Can you charge it with my phone? So it won't keep buzzing? "
I took out my phone. One of its signature functions was to charge other phones. Also, Gong CaiCai had already used it to charge Gong CaiCai's iPhone once. Just like Eunuch Cao said: If you've already charged it once, you don't have to worry about charging it a second time …
Teacher Hu also took out his phone. It was the same model as mine and he was also going to let Gong CaiCai use it to charge. He was slightly surprised when he saw my phone was the same as his.
"Huh? Ye Lin, you also bought this brand! You can't even buy it now! Since you can also charge it for Gong CaiCai, I'll let you have it! "
The atmosphere was so weird! Isn't it just your phone and my phone that can be plugged into Gong CaiCai's iPhone 4 and injected with energy? Why does it feel like it's a threesome?
"Gong CaiCai, come in! The program is ready! "
Professor Bai called out from inside.
Gong CaiCai walked into the classroom in a hurry and did not accept the energy provided by me or Teacher Hu.
For the next period of time, Teacher Hu and I sat on the bench and did nothing but listen to him explain the theory of Scientific Happiness to me.
I listened in one ear and out the other. I was thinking about how to expose Professor Bai's trick.
After 15 unbearable minutes, Gong CaiCai slowly walked out. Her face was red, her emotions were fluctuating, and her eyes were filled with uneasiness.
"How is it? Is the future prediction accurate? "Teacher Hu asked impatiently.
"I, I don't know …" Gong CaiCai stammered, "It should be … possible …"
I don't know why, but Gong CaiCai looked at me guiltily.
What? Does your future that was calculated by Scientific Happiness have anything to do with me?
That's not wrong, because I'm about to expose the pseudoscience of Scientific Happiness and save your future!
I swaggered in before Professor Bai's preparation time was over. Professor Bai did not get angry and generously let me sit in front of the podium.
After registering my name and age, Professor Bai asked a few questions about my hobbies. I answered truthfully and did not feel like I could predict my future with this little bit of information.
Then, Professor Bai handed me a strange piece of printed paper. There were many abstract paintings with symbolic meanings drawn on it. Some were doves of peace, some were sad faces of young girls, and above all the paintings was a huge maze.
Professor Bai told me to draw the route out of the maze within 5 minutes, and I did it. In fact, the maze was not difficult, and I always felt that there was more than one route out of the maze.
Was he testing my subconscious to determine which abstract paintings I deliberately avoided in the process of solving the maze?
Professor Bai took out a scanner stick and scanned my maze map into the computer. After the sound of a hard disk spinning, he slowly said:
"Ye Lin, you seem to be troubled …"
Nonsense! Most people are troubled. Do you think I'll be fooled into responding to you?
"Looking at your expression, it seems that you don't trust our Scientific Happiness Conference … You might think that the white screen of the laptop is deliberately mystifying, but to be honest, confidentiality is one thing, and the other is that we must carefully decide which of the calculated results can be told to the subjects and which should be hidden."
"After all, the future can't be smooth sailing. There is nothing colder and more ruthless than the truth in this world. In the conference, people like me are called 'wise men'. I just have a little bit of ability to distinguish which truths are useful to the subjects and hide the rest. "
"I don't need to hide." I raised my voice and said, "Whether I'll be the president of the country in the future or be locked up in Shanxi to dig coal, you can tell me the truth!"
"That won't do." Professor Bai smiled warmly. "Although the causal calculation program was written by the president of the conference, the Great Sage, it is still not perfect. It is still being improved today. Some of the calculation results are inaccurate and must be filtered manually. Moreover, the calculation is based on the chaotic wandering theory … "
"Okay, okay." I said impatiently, "You can directly predict my future. If you can't predict it accurately, I'll announce that you're all liars!"
"Then I'll start." Professor Bai's confident smile made me feel a little uneasy.
"Ye Lin, the calculation results show that you're currently in a particularly troubled state …"
"You're troubled because … you don't know if you broke the law … you're worried that you'll be arrested and sent to prison …"
I was shocked and barely controlled my expression.
How does he know? I don't know if I committed murder or not. How could he calculate this kind of secret through the program?
No, I can't be fooled by him. He's no different from a fortune teller on the street. Also, he talked to Gong CaiCai beforehand. Maybe he got some information about me from Gong CaiCai. If he knows that I fight all day, it's normal for him to speculate that I'm worried about injuring someone and going to prison.
"Am I right?" Professor Bai asked me confidently.
I put on a disdainful face and said coldly, "Continue."
"Well, according to the calculations, you have a good relationship with your father …"
What's so hard to calculate! I'm afraid you've already gotten the relevant information from Gong CaiCai!
"But your relationship with your mother isn't good enough …"
It's not just not good enough! We're about to meet on the battlefield! If he knows that I'm from a single-parent family, then it's not a big deal to know that.
"Oh, the calculations also show that there's a 97% chance that you have a younger sister and you like her a lot …"
Calm down! Although it sounds scary, since I've gotten information from Gong CaiCai, then maybe the other party already knows about Ai Mi's existence. And in front of Gong CaiCai, I once said that Ai Mi was my cousin.
"That's it?" I sneered, "How can this be considered predicting the future? At least tell me some secrets that no one else can know, right? "
Professor Bai stared at the computer screen cautiously, thought for a while, and finally said:
"You seem to like the robot toy, Optimus Prime, and it was taken away by someone …"
This … Gong CaiCai probably doesn't know? A sense of fear gradually welled up from the bottom of my heart.
"In addition, you seem to want your father to remarry, and there's an 86% chance that the person you chose to remarry is already pregnant with your father's child …"
Damn, that's impossible! How can this be calculated! I did tell this to the class leader, but she promised to keep it a secret. She's not a blabbermouth!
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