"They can even lose in Thailand? And it's 1: 5? The Chinese men's football team, f * ck your grandma! "
When Xiao Qin and I arrived at the market below her house, we could hear the angry roar coming from the shoe repair shop in the distance.
"Ye Lin classmate, the uncle will only sell a listening device to people I recommend." Xiao Qin said carefully, "But he's always in a bad mood when the China team loses, I'm afraid today …"
As a person who lived in seclusion, the shoemaker uncle's curses towards the men's soccer team were a bit too flamboyant.
"They even want to go out of Asia and into the world!? I won't be able to see the China men's soccer team enter the second round of the World Cup! What about realizing the China Dream? Realize the bullshit China Dream! You stinky people only know how to sleepwalk! My dad died at your feet for nothing! "
"Ah?" I was shocked and couldn't help but ask Xiao Qin: "Did the shoemaker uncle's dad get kicked to death by the soccer team when he was eating at a restaurant?"
"No, I heard the shoemaker's dad was just rescued from a heart attack, then he went to watch the national team's World Cup match, then … then he died from anger."
Damn, you really need to be cautious when watching football. Cherish your life and stay away from the national team. I remember before my grandfather passed away, he grabbed my dad's hand and told him he had two wishes. One was for him to get married again, and the other was to burn a recording of the match for him if the national team enters the top 16 of the World Cup one day.
Neither of his wishes have been fulfilled! Although there's some progress on my dad's remarriage and I'm trying my best to matchmake my dad and Auntie Ren, I can't do anything about the national soccer team. Grandpa, please don't blame me in heaven. If I can't do it, I'll burn a video of women's soccer for you.
"Um, Ye Lin classmate, who are you trying to eavesdrop on?" Xiao Qin said worriedly, "Eavesdropping on other people is against the law …"
You're the only one who has no right to say that! Aren't you the one who's happily eavesdropping on me? Not only did you eavesdrop on my daily conversations with my dad, but you also eavesdropped on the fact that Ai Mi is my sister!
Xiao Qin clenched her small fist and raised it in front of her chest.
"It's not illegal for me to eavesdrop on you. It's because Ye Lin classmate allowed it! "
"What!? When did I allow you to eavesdrop on me? "
"… In my dream."
"Then please marry the me in your dream! Don't give me any more trouble! "
Xiao Qin suddenly lowered her head. I thought I had accidentally hurt her feelings, but when I looked carefully, I saw that she was blushing.
"Actually, I've already been married to Ye Lin classmate 100 times in my dreams. Sometimes I dream that I'm not married to Ye Lin classmate and I wake up crying …"
A dream within a dream, was this the Inception Dream Space!? Don't like me in such an exaggerated manner!
"There was also a dream where aliens turned Ye Lin classmate into a short-legged dachshund, but that dream had a good ending …"
I've already become a dog. How can I have a good ending? Are you … are you going to play with me? And why short-legged sausages!? I'd rather become a husky, or the same species as Obama, than become a short-legged sausage! Even the aliens have to laugh at my short legs!
"There's also a certain chance that I'm a boy and Ye Lin classmate is a girl … The plot is usually pretty embarrassing, I … I'm too embarrassed to say it out loud!"
Just this premise alone was already very embarrassing! What's the 'certain chance'! Are you still unable to fix your gender as female in your subconscious!
"When I dream that Ye Lin classmate is a girl, your face is always the same delicate face from before. The most infuriating thing is that the feminine Ye Lin classmate's breasts are often bigger than mine …"
Didn't you say you were too embarrassed to say the plot! Whose breasts are bigger than yours! These are pectoral muscles! Do you understand pectoral muscles!
"Last night, I dreamt of that Ye Lin classmate again. When I saw that pair of breasts that were almost as big as Gong CaiCai's, I got so angry that I grabbed them with both hands and squeezed them. Ye Lin classmate's embarrassed and anxious expression was too cute …"
If I heard correctly, Xiao Qin seemed to have swallowed a mouthful of saliva.
Fuck, you're subconsciously trying to get revenge on me! The male part of your subconscious holds a grudge because I squeezed your breasts yesterday, so you squeezed mine in your dreams! (Even though I didn't) I'm not allowed to dream that I'm a girl anymore! I'm already this bad, even if I had a pair of breasts like Gong CaiCai's, I still wouldn't be able to get married!
The shoemaker uncle continued to smash things in the shoe repair shop.
"What's the point of spending a lot of money to raise these grandsons! Even the North Korean team plays better than you guys! If I was the president, I'd send you all to Shanxi to dig coal! Who told you to go clubbing, take drugs, and find prostitutes … I don't believe that out of 1.3 billion people in China, we can't find at least 11 people who can play soccer! "
The sliding door of the shoe repair shop was tightly shut. A professional woman wearing high heels was planning to repair her shoes, but when she heard the earth-shattering curses, she didn't dare knock and left in a low voice.
Xiao Qin tried to persuade me: "If we go buy a listening device from the shoemaker uncle, he won't pay attention to us. How about we go upstairs and eat together before my mom comes home. After eating, we can eat me …"
I don't want it to be so dangerous! If I walk a tightrope when Auntie Ren could come back at any time, I will also die of a heart attack like the shoemaker uncle's dad! Also, I want to fulfill my grandpa's last wish! Although I probably won't be able to see the national team enter the top 16 of the World Cup in my lifetime, there's still hope for my dad to remarry! I don't want Auntie Ren's body to be damaged from anger!
Thus I didn't agree to go upstairs to eat with Xiao Qin (and eat her). Instead, I brought her to the convenience supermarket. I paid for canned hawthorns, canned oranges, and a supplement to supplement folic acid, iron, and zinc. (Although the description says it's good for pregnant women, the name of the product does not specify that it's for pregnant women).
Xiao Qin didn't know what was going on and followed behind me with a puzzled expression.
When we arrived at the cashier to pay, the cashier lady didn't seem to be very familiar with Xiao Qin. Although Xiao Qin lives here, she probably doesn't shop here often.
I don't know if it was because of the price, but there weren't many people in the convenience supermarket. The cashier lady didn't say anything when she scanned the two cans, but when she saw the folic acid supplement, she frowned and looked at me. Then she looked behind me and was attracted by a bag of snacks on the shelf. It was Xiao Qin who didn't seem very smart.
"Is that your girlfriend?" The cashier lady asked in a checking tone.
"Sort of." I replied embarrassedly. Xiao Qin didn't notice our conversation.
The cashier lady suddenly lowered her voice and asked me with a serious expression: "Aren't you going to get rid of it?"
"What?"
"Sigh, you youngsters! The pharmacy is right across the street, how far can you walk to buy a condom? "
What the f * ck! You're such a busybody! No wonder there are so few customers coming here to buy things! What, do you think I'm buying folic acid for Xiao Qin? Do you think I'm planning on letting her give birth since she's pregnant at such a young age?
"No, no." I waved my hands. I thought that since the cashier lady wasn't familiar with Xiao Qin, she probably doesn't know Auntie Ren either. So I told her the truth: "The one who's pregnant isn't my girlfriend, it's my girlfriend's mother, but her mother doesn't know yet …"
The cashier lady was shocked: "Her mother doesn't know, how do you know? Don't tell me you and your mother-in-law … "
I quickly denied: "How is that possible! Actually, I'm old … "
I was about to say 'my dad', but then I felt that this relationship was too shocking, so I swallowed it back and changed it to "Actually, it's because my father-in-law isn't old yet and my mother-in-law got tricked again!"
The cashier lady's eyes were full of suspicion. Maybe she was wondering why the father-in-law didn't buy the supplements himself if his mother-in-law was pregnant and instead asked his son-in-law to do it for him. She also said that his mother-in-law didn't know she was pregnant, so there were many suspicious points. She probably hated herself for not being Conan and not being able to investigate the truth.
At this time, Xiao Qin came over with the ¥3 bag of snacks and asked me carefully:
"Ye Lin classmate, can you buy this for me?"
Her eyes had the same pitiful expression as Bambi.
I handed the snacks to the cashier lady. I don't know what the cashier lady was thinking, but she suddenly said:
"Little girl, the world is dangerous right now, you need to be more careful!"
Xiao Qin didn't understand what she meant. She hugged my arm and said with a smile:
"Ye Lin classmate treats me really well! We'll definitely get married in the future! "
"Really?" The cashier lady put on an expression of disbelief, "It'll be fine as long as your mother doesn't get in the way!"
This sentence seemed to poke at Xiao Qin's sore spot, she pouted and said:
"Although my mom doesn't agree right now … she will definitely agree in the future! Ye Lin classmate specifically bought my mom's favorite food to curry favor with her and build a good relationship with her! "
The cashier lady snorted, "I'm afraid your relationship is so good that you'll be jealous!"
Damn, you're too gossipy! No wonder no one comes here to buy things! If it wasn't for Xiao Qin, I wouldn't have let it go so easily!
After receiving the change, I glared at the cashier lady and left the supermarket with Xiao Qin.
The cashier lady snorted as if she was talking to herself: "The world is dangerous … people nowadays are willing to do anything …"
I carried the bag and took Xiao Qin to the Jar Meat Restaurant for dinner. Then I handed the bag to Xiao Qin and told her to bring it home for Auntie Ren to eat. I told her to say she bought it herself and not to mention my name.
"Why! If my mom knows Ye Lin classmate bought it for her, she won't be unhappy! Also, aren't you going upstairs with me? "
"Well, I won't be going up today." I said, "Will the shoemaker uncle sell me the listening device if I mention your name?"
"About, about the same! The shoemaker uncle might ask you a few questions about me to test you, but it's not difficult at all for Ye Lin classmate! — — Are you really not going to come to my house to sleep … no, sit for a while? "
No need! If it's only for a moment of pleasure, how can I achieve China's goal of entering the World Cup … no, it's my goal of getting my dad remarried! Right now, Auntie Ren's health is the most important! I can't let anything happen to the child in her stomach! This is a very, very crucial mission item!
You've already exceeded your reading limit for today. If you want to read more, please log in.
Login
Select text and click 'Report' to let us know about any bad translation.
