"To hell with 'Octopus Man'! This is a variation of the tentacles in Japanese H&M cartoons! Even if you make money from normal movies, you still want to make porn, right? "
"Don't refuse so quickly!" Director Cao said disappointedly, "Look at how many exciting lines there are in Octopus Man! For example, this one: 'Female devil, tell me the location of the time bomb! Otherwise, I'll use my tentacles to torture you until you can't even beg for death! These tentacles of justice, even if it's the darkest abyss, they will bravely advance and never look back! '"
"Who the f * ck wrote these lines? Since ancient times, which monster with tentacles has been righteous! Don't say anymore, I definitely won't act in this movie! You can find whoever you want to play the role! "
Director Cao scratched his ear in embarrassment after hearing my rejection, "Actually, I think this movie is quite suitable for you. The other similar script I have isn't good. This was written by a Japanese friend, it's called 'I was turned into a girl by the gods and forced to marry a tentacle monster' …"
Fuck off! Hurry up and destroy this kind of script! Why don't you just ask Shu Zhe to act in this movie!
Director Cao didn't give up and read the contents of 'Chinese Heroism: Anti-Japanese Heavenly King' to me. '
"In this movie, you have to fight against the Japanese ronin's violent organization 'Shin Hyun Group' …"
"Who gave this name! There's nothing worse than this! It sounds like it's fine to have such a weak enemy! "
Director Cao felt wronged when he saw that I was also dissatisfied with 'Chinese Heroism: Anti-Japanese Heavenly King'.
"Xiao Ye Zi, this movie is the most reasonable, it's even more reasonable than those anti-Japanese movies on TV. Think about it, our army becomes wuxia and the Japanese pirates become ninjas. Look at how balanced it is! If you think the name Shin Hyun Group doesn't sound good, you can change it! I already felt that Shin Hyun Group was more like a samurai group than a ninja group, it's a bit off … "
After I rejected a bunch of scripts, Director Cao ferociously took out his trump card.
"Xiao Ye Zi, I bet you'll be interested in this script! I carefully picked this out of over a hundred scripts! Also, I think whoever acts in this movie will be popular! It will definitely leave a mark in the history of China's film industry! "
Seeing how awesome Director Cao's speech was, I went over to take a look. I saw seven words written on the cover of the script — — The Wonder of the Bitter Premier's Speech.
He casually flipped through two pages and saw that the lines were all like this:
"The Premier's mission is to save China!"
"Think of a way to deal with Godzilla, Prime Minister!"
"Prime Minister, the Mutants experiment in the United States is out of control, and Wolverine and Deadpool are coming together! Please stop them and ensure the safe evacuation of the people! "
"Premier, the Three-body Star has arrived! They invited you to participate in the Universe Martial Arts Tournament. If you refuse to participate, they will destroy the Earth with their Star Destroyers! You're shouldering the hopes of the world's eight billion people. Please win! "
"Premier! Premier! You've worked hard for the country and the people all your life, and you've finally become sick from overwork and have to travel to the west! We will definitely carry on your unfulfilled wish and nurture another prime minister to take the blame for the people! "
Not only were the lines filled to the brim, but even the ending song was also written.
The "Premier's Conditions" still left behind the smoke of Marxism-Leninism and the great wall of flesh and blood of the new China's millions of martyrs. The air was filled with the madness of the Army Killer Fist. Tomorrow, tomorrow's country, where will they go until the last breath of their lives! This script is a parody of Zhou Enlai! Also, why does the name Shao Zhiqi seem like it's an allusion to Liu Shaoqi! This type of film is interesting enough, but how can it pass the SARFT's review!
"That's a problem." Director Cao sighed, "It's rare that this script was written by an enthusiastic audience, and it clearly states that you're only accepted as the main character."
Enthusiastic audience? They want me to be the main character? I carefully looked for the signature on the script with a bad premonition, and sure enough, I found the words "Teacher Shui Qin".
So it was written by Xiao Qin! No wonder the style of the script was so familiar! I know you've always thought about my wish to be a martial arts star when I was young, and I'm also grateful that you took the time to write a script for me while you were updating your manga. But forget about making it into a movie, even if you drew it into a manga, it would be easily censored!
After discussing for a long time, we still couldn't reach an agreement. I couldn't bear to see Director Cao return empty-handed, so I recommended young master Xu TianMing to act as the male lead in "Octopus Man".
"Would he be willing to act?" Director Cao was shocked, "His salary increased after he became popular in 'Substitute Hero'. Also, Octopus Man isn't a character that accumulates popularity …"
Hmph, you also know that whoever acts as Octopus Man will lose popularity! Then why did you recommend him to me?
I told Director Cao not to worry, I have a way to get Xu TianMing to accept the script for "Octopus Man" (I have proof that Xu TianMing is a naked demon). Director Cao left happily when he saw how confident I was.
"Young master Xu, if you have time to be a naked demon, why don't you accept Director Cao's movie instead? The male lead in "Octopus Man" is a bit perverted, I think it's very suitable for you. Do you want to take it? If you don't take it, it'll be hard for me! "
Since I had something on him, young master Xu could only agree to my request. However, he seemed to be enjoying himself during the filming — — after all, Octopus Man had 12 witches to 'punish'.
The filming of "Octopus Man" was very lively. Many students from Zhong Hai Civil and Military Academy, including Wei Yu, made cameos. There was even an albino monkey that the fire chief of Yi Ning District adopted in Cuisong Mountain. Later, the monkey left a deep impression on the audience when he sat on the witch's shoulder. From then on, he became an animal movie star. His appearance fee increased day by day. It can be seen that not only were ordinary people worse than dogs in Dong Shan city, they were also worse than monkeys.
While Auntie Ren was opening a dojo, Director Cao was filming a movie, and Shu Zhe was a nude body double, I quickly took care of all the fake adult products I left at school last time.
I took advantage of the darkness of the night to throw the massage sticks far away from the school to a pile of trash far away from the school.
As for the inflatable 'Seven Fairies', I gave it to a performance artist who was going to run around naked with the inflatable doll. Apparently, he was determined to compete with the naked man in Beijing. Since the quality wasn't good, he made up for it with quantity. He formed a seven-man rainbow squad with his friends to run around naked.
Afterwards, the performance artists were questioned by the police. Constable Ma asked me if I was the one who provided them with the inflatable dolls.
"I gave it to them, but I don't know what they're going to do with it!"
I put my hands in my pockets and gave Constable Ma a half asleep face.
"Shameful!" Constable Ma probably didn't have any concrete evidence, so he could only shout at me, "You've lowered the moral standards of the entire Dong Shan city!"
I used the wet wipes to wipe the dust off the table. Other than the smell of medicine, it was pretty useful.
The only accident was when I accidentally ate the insanely spicy chicken wings Shu Zhe brought back. It was too spicy, so I made a mistake and wiped my mouth with the wet wipes. It made my lips numb for the entire afternoon.
"You bastard!" I pressed Shu Zhe down on the bed and smacked his butt to vent my anger, "You don't eat the insanely spicy chicken wings, and you know I don't eat anything too spicy, so why did you bring it back? You're clearly trying to harm me! "
"I'm innocent, bro Ye Lin! The cameraman packed it up and forced me to bring it back! It's not like I treated you … "
After Shu Zhe appeared nude in a few movies, his temperament became more feminine. I couldn't stay calm when I heard his wails.
"You still dare to talk back!"
Room 222 spent another meaningful day in the midst of Shu Zhe's screams.
It was already late October and the weather in Dong Shan city was gradually getting colder. Everyone in Qing Zi High School put on the inner lining of their school uniform. For the girls, they even had black velvet stockings for autumn and winter. Although it's not as transparent as silk stockings, it's still a beautiful sight from afar.
It was another weekend. Since Zhuang Ni's birthday (Halloween) was approaching, the class leader was secretly preparing to celebrate her birthday. At this time, Principal He Qimei found the class leader and said:
"Shu Sha, you did a good job at the gardener's hut, but I'm sorry you didn't continue working there. This Sunday, there's a problem with the on-duty schedule of the convenience store on campus. As a result, none of the employees were able to come to work. I remember that you helped out in the convenience store when you were a freshman in high school. Can you ask a few classmates you trust to help the school run the convenience store for a day? "
The class leader had her reasons for quitting her job at the gardener's hut. After returning from the island trip, Xiao Qin went to the gardener's hut many times with the excuse that she needed to stay up late to draw manga. Although Xiao Qin's English speaking environment was helpful to the class leader, the sound of Xiao Qin's pen on paper in the middle of the night was like a mouse grinding its teeth. It made the class leader so nervous that she couldn't sleep well, and she was too embarrassed to tell Xiao Qin.
What was even worse was that Xiao Qin drank a new drink that she bought after staying up late to draw manga. It turned out that the drink contained a small amount of alcohol. After coming into contact with BWK, Xiao Qin, who wasn't a good drinker, got drunk more easily. After getting drunk, Xiao Qin developed a bully personality. She threw her drawings all over the floor while waking up the class leader, who finally fell asleep, to massage her shoulders. If the class leader didn't agree, she would scare her with her fists and became a bully for the whole night.
Even though Gong CaiCai apologized to the class leader the next day after she woke up, the class leader was too tired. She quit her job at the gardener's hut and returned to the girl's dorm every night to sleep with Gong CaiCai, so Gong CaiCai had fewer nightmares.
The other reason the class leader quit her job at the gardener's hut was because Principal He Qimei increased the amount of scholarships given to outstanding students in order for Qing Zi High to do well on the high school entrance exams. Also, ever since Shu Zhe signed with Tian Mu Xing Guang Xing, he never showed his face in any movies, but he still received some pocket money from time to time, so the part-time job became even less important to the class leader.
"Principal He, since you need my help and you trust me so much, why don't you leave the convenience store to me tomorrow? Not only will I run the store normally, but I'll also make sure everything is organized neatly. "
Principal He Qimei thought about Shu Sha's OCD and a drop of cold sweat dripped down her forehead.
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