"Underwear? There's no need to ask, it must have been stolen by Obama! "
Ai Mi calmly explained to Xiong YaoYue.
"Why would your dog steal underwear!"
"Who knows! It's probably the stalker who kept pestering me when I was in America and taught Obama to do this. "
"If you're that capable, why don't you become an animal trainer instead of a stalker!"
"Winnie, if you take away the manservant's chance to spit, then he won't have anything to do …"
I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but I couldn't really knock before Xiong YaoYue found a replacement underwear.
"Winnie, I have a lot of underwear that I haven't worn before, you can choose one to wear."
"Eh? How can I … "
It's not the time to be polite! Don't tell me you're not embarrassed to walk home without wearing underwear!
"How about this one? It's quite elastic, even Winnie should be able to wear it. "
"Miss Ai Mi makes it sound like my butt is big …"
"It's already a lot bigger than me! Anyway, hurry up and try it on! "
"Ah, it's so tight! My flesh hurts! "
"It can't be helped, this is my biggest underwear, you have to bear with it!"
"Ah! Why am I wearing the Qing Zi Academy's uniform again? I should have worn the T-shirt and shorts that I wore when I went out! That way I wouldn't be discovered even if I didn't wear underwear! "
"If you walk around the school without your school uniform, you might be questioned. Isn't it a terrible thing to be taken to the security room for questioning without your underwear?"
"That's true … but this underwear is still too tight …"
"If you can't take it anymore, I'll tell the manservant to take off his underwear for you."
Damn, what kind of stupid idea did Ai Mi come up with! It sounded like they were both wearing clothes. I pushed open the door and entered. I saw Xiong YaoYue standing in the middle of the living room with her legs crossed and Ai Mi sitting on the sofa drinking a can of sugar-free iced coffee.
"How did you get in?" Xiong YaoYue asked, "We clearly locked the door from the inside."
Ai Mi looked up from the top of the coffee can and said flatly:
"It was Obama who opened the door. After he stole your underwear, he went out to find someone to trade for food — he can usually open a simple door lock."
Ai Mi noticed that Xiong YaoYue and I were looking at her strangely.
"Why are you looking at me like that?"
You're still asking why? Your dog has become a demon! He was cunning and wretched, comparable to the old yellow ox that persuaded the cowherd to steal the clothes of the seven fairies!
After the underwear incident, Xiong YaoYue, who was looking forward to dinner, suddenly changed her mind and said goodbye to Ai Mi.
"Miss Ai Mi, tomorrow is Monday. I remember I still have a lot of homework to do. Can I go back first?"
"That's it." Although she pretended to be indifferent on the surface, she could still hear a little disappointment in her tone, "I'm a little tired anyway … I'll let Peng TouSi drive you."
"No need, no need!" Xiong YaoYue hurriedly waved her hand. "My house isn't too far away. I want to walk back by myself. I ate so much for lunch. If I don't exercise, I'll get fat!"
"It's only your chest and butt that get fat …" Ai Mi muttered.
"Miss Ai Mi, I also have … how do I say that word … Oh right, I have a presumptuous request!"
"Say it! You'll have a lot of benefits if you pledge your loyalty to me! "
Damn, don't speak like a Japanese devil! Is it because the set of the Magic Cauldron isn't far from the set of the anti-Japanese drama, so you heard a lot of their lines? Don't get it wrong! You're an American imperialist, not a Japanese militarist! In the early years of China, you would lose your head if you made a mistake!
"Um … can you let Ye Lin drive me for a while?"
"Why do you need a manservant to drive you?"
"I have something to discuss with Ye Lin." Xiong YaoYue smiled at Ai Mi, "But if Miss Ai Mi doesn't want Ye Lin to leave right now, then it's fine if I go back alone. It's not that important anyway …"
"Tsk, I can pick up 1000 manservants in one trip to the subway station, who wouldn't want to part with him! Take him with you! We can also discuss forming a Dota team. "
"Ah?" Xiong YaoYue was surprised, "Isn't it a LOL team? I don't know how to play Dota! "
"Whatever." Ai Mi said, "You just have to form a team that can lead me … no, win a battle under my leadership, then you'll have done a great service! At that time, I'll promote you to a level 7 subordinate and you'll enjoy a higher level of treatment! "I curiously pointed at my nose and asked Ai Mi:" What level am I? "
Ai Mi tilted her head to the side and snorted. Her twin ponytails swung like a swing.
"Manservants are level -1000. You can only rise one level if you serve me for a year."
So it takes 1000 years to become a positive number! Do you think I'm a thousand year tortoise?
Thus, I accompanied my superior, Xiong YaoYue, who was 1007 levels higher than me, out of Qing Zi Academy's gates with a gloomy heart.
When we passed by the gate, the security guards glanced at us a few more times, but I was already familiar with them and Xiong YaoYue was also wearing her school uniform, so we didn't reveal anything.
"Ye Lin." Xiong YaoYue said to me with a worried expression after we reached a secluded alleyway, "I think I'm starting to get unlucky."
"What? How are you unlucky? "
"Haven't you heard? Extreme joy turns to sorrow, that's a common occurrence! Wasn't there someone in England who won a huge lottery, then everyone sued him and he ended up in debt? "
"What does that have to do with you?"
"How does it have nothing to do with me! There were too many good things that happened today, I knew I would definitely get my retribution! My underwear was probably stolen by Clinton! "
It's not Clinton, it's Obama! Although Clinton might have a hobby of stealing underwear (for example, White House interns), don't randomly change the name of Ai Mi's dog!
"If I stay for dinner, I will definitely meet with even greater misfortune! I might get run over by a road roller when I go out! "
Can't a normal car satisfy you? Even if you die, you have to leave behind a bear skin as a souvenir?
"Ye Lin, why aren't you afraid at all! Haven't you heard that the amount of happiness in a person's life is fixed? If you use it up early, you will only have misfortune for the rest of your life! "
Who told you such an unscientific thing! If you believe this fallacy, be careful of being tricked into a multi-level marketing organization!
"Anyway, I have to take measures, I can't just sit and wait for death!"
Xiong YaoYue took out the ¥900 she won from playing rock-paper-scissors with Ai Mi from her backpack.
"It must be because the money came too easily, it lowered my moral value! I have to donate it! "
I held back my laughter, "To who?"
Xiong YaoYue frowned and thought:
"The Red Cross definitely won't work. I might as well spend it myself if I give it to Guo Meimei … Ye Lin, do you know any reliable charity foundations?"
"If it were me, I would donate it to Jet Li's One Foundation." I said, "At least they often publish their annual financial reports on their website, and Jet Li's reputation is also guaranteed. If something really happens, everyone knows who to blame. It's not like the Red Society, where they can only blame Guo Meimei, and not a single person in charge will show up."
"Huh? It sounds like you've donated money to the One Foundation before? "
I haven't actually donated, but my dad donated during the Ya 'an earthquake. At the time, the One Foundation was still appealing on their website for supplies, such as jacks, tents, sleeping bags, cotton-padded clothes, and blankets. They hoped everyone would give priority to donating supplies.
My family's online store has a lot of supplies, but none of them can be used in the disaster area! The leopard print gaming uniform can't be worn as cotton-padded clothes! A massage stick can't replace a jack! If I donate all kinds of H items to the disaster area, it would hurt the souls of the earthquake orphans a second time! Brother Jie's nose would become crooked from anger!
"Okay, since you have experience, you can help me donate this money to the One Foundation!" Xiong YaoYue said as she stuffed the ¥900 into my hands.
Xiong YaoYue's fingers trembled a bit when she said goodbye to the RMB and revealed a reluctant expression.
I noticed and said with a smile: "You earned this by riding Ai Mi's horse, so it's considered hard work. How about you keep the ¥100?"
"Is that okay?" Xiong YaoYue seemed to be looking forward to someone's permission.
"Why not! Did you watch Stephen Chow's "Gambling Saint" when you were a kid? Every time a gambler and a gambling saint win money, they have to give 95% of it to charity, otherwise their master, the Gambling God, wouldn't agree! If you donate more than half of it, you won't lose your character! "
"That seems to make sense, but what's 95% of 900 …" Xiong YaoYue counted with her fingers.
"Don't count it! It's already a lot if you donate ¥800! I'll use online banking when I get home … "
I suddenly remembered that when Brother Jie was promoting the One Foundation, he seemed to say that it wasn't easy to receive donations, and it was even more difficult to spend them (giving Guo Meimei flowers is another matter). It seems that there is a certain cost to properly use the donations.
Since that's the case, why would the One Foundation go through so much trouble for our donations? Isn't there a suitable place to receive donations in front of us? If you want to ask where it is, isn't it the Dong Shan City Yining District Special Education School that Peng TouSi once drove me to visit!
This charity school dedicated to the education of disabled children was built by Ai ShuQiao's current husband, John. But Ai ShuQiao has been scheming to cut off these donations, so the school recently encountered a lot of financial difficulties. Some teachers even took the initiative to postpone receiving their salaries!
It's better if I contact Peng TouSi and directly transfer the money to the special education school's account. Although it's a drop in the bucket, it will still add up. If Xiong YaoYue wants to donate in the future, she will also donate to the special education school. I can even take Xiong YaoYue to the special education school and let her see who she is donating to!
However, I won't play Go with Xiao Yu anymore. I can't beat her and I don't want to embarrass myself anymore.
I told Xiong YaoYue about the special education school in Dong Shan City Yining District. I also told her that I planned on donating the money there and asked if she agreed.
I heard that the children in that school suffer from all kinds of disabilities. Although the teachers are very loving, they are currently facing financial difficulties, so some students might have to leave. Xiong YaoYue couldn't help but be deeply moved and was about to burst into tears.
She stuffed the ¥100 I refunded back into my hands and said:
"Donate it all to them! I'm already very happy that I have all four limbs! "
"Eh? If you want to save your luck, you only need to donate 95% … "
"Next time I'll donate 95%! They're in such a difficult situation … I can still eat a luxurious meal … sob sob sob … "
Don't wipe your tears with your sleeves! Passersby will think I'm bullying you!
Speaking of which, because Xiong YaoYue was wearing Ai Mi's tight underwear, she had to clasp her legs when she walked, but she seemed much more ladylike than usual.
"Winnie, if you walk like this normally, you'll be more popular among the boys!" I don't know why I told her that.
"No shit!" Xiong YaoYue made a loser expression at me, "Because if I walk too fast, my underwear will explode!"
"Explode!?"
"Even if it doesn't explode, it will still split open! If you know that, why aren't you walking slower, do you want to laugh at me!? "
She suddenly reached over and hugged my arm.
"What, what are you doing!?" I turned pale with fright.
"What else could it be?" Xiong YaoYue leaned half of her weight on me and rolled her eyes at me, "I'm telling you to walk slower, and at the same time, I'm borrowing some strength from your body to prevent my underwear from splitting open!"
"If you're so worried about your underwear splitting open, why don't you let Peng TouSi drive you home!"
"That will ruin my luck! Didn't you see that I didn't even dare to stay for dinner! "
Xiong YaoYue's full chest unintentionally rubbed against my elbow and it made my heart itch.
"Don't, don't be like this … I can't walk properly! Can I call a taxi to take you home!? "
"You want to call a taxi when you have all four limbs! Are you worthy of the children at the special education school! "
Eh? You're lecturing me instead! I'm worried that your underwear will explode … no, split open!
"Since you're gay, it's not like I'm losing out if I hug your arm, right?"
"I already told you a hundred times, I'm not gay!"
"Okay, okay, I'll keep it a secret in front of others …"
Since we were both wearing Qing Zi Academy's uniform and had an intimate posture, it was natural that passersby would think we were a couple.
"Hehe, it's pretty fun …"
"How is it fun?"
"The passersby all think you're my boyfriend, they don't know you're gay …"
I glared at her fiercely and she swallowed the rest of her words.
But she still wanted more, so she turned around and said to an elementary school girl who was carrying a red backpack:
"Little girl! Don't find a bad tempered boyfriend in the future! "
She said while pointing at the band-aid on her face.
"Did you see that? She was beaten by domestic violence! Also, my leg is crippled! "
The elementary school girl glanced at us and ran away with a pale face.
"What are you saying!" I wanted to give Xiong YaoYue a knock on the head, but she caught it.
She didn't want to give up and shouted, "You hit me on the street! Someone come! Why is my life so bitter! "
"Stop, I'm begging you to stop!" I surrendered to Xiong YaoYue before the crowd gathered.
"Ah!" Xiong YaoYue suddenly exclaimed with a bright red face.
"What's wrong?"
"Underwear … My underwear split open!"
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