It blew up on Weibo!
"Quick, watch Beijing TV's Spring Festival Gala!"
"This is too face smacking! This is too fucking face smacking! "
"He really dares to say anything, damn!"
"I have to give it to him too!"
"Teacher Shanshan, you're my goddess! You're my dream lover! Why have you been led down a different path by that fellow, Face-smacking Zhang? Don't tell me you'll become 'Face-smacking Shirt' in the future? "
"Face-smacking Shirt? Pfft! "
"Hahahahaha!"
"Teacher Shanshan has also been led astray!"
"Goudan, this is all written by Zhang Ye!"
"If he didn't come up with these lines, I would have done a live broadcast of myself eating sh * t!"
"Standing on the stage of the Spring Festival Gala and using a skit to openly scold people, this is probably the highest level of scolding, right? The title of Face-smacking Zhang is really not just for show! "
"Yeah, standing on the stage of the Spring Festival Gala and scolding people, I can't bear to watch it anymore!"
"I used to think that Teacher Zhang's scolding skills had already broken through the sky, but I never expected that he would reach a new height!"
"Han Li is an idiot!"
"That idiot, why did you provoke him for no reason!"
...
Back at home.
His third sister was laughing so hard that she was crying. As she laughed, she slapped the sofa's armrest and shouted, "This is so awesome! It feels so good! Scold them! Continue scolding them! "
His third aunt didn't know whether to laugh or cry. "This Little Ye!"
His second aunt wiped away her sweat and said, "This is a national broadcast. Is it really alright for Little Ye and the others to say that?"
His mother said, "Even if it's a global broadcast, as long as someone provokes him, that kid will still scold them onstage. Don't you all know what kind of temper he has?"
His second sister shouted, "My brother is mighty!"
...
Onstage.
The skit was getting better and better.
Zhang Ye walked over anxiously and explained, "Aiyo, Section Chief Ma, I didn't mean it that way. I was just thinking, how could someone become so popular just by playing with the leader? Surely that can't be, right? "
Dong Shanshan raised an eyebrow and glanced at him. "Surely? Hehe, Hao Jian, I treat you as one of my own now! I'll let you see how I, Ma Jingjing, got to where I am today, step by step! "While speaking, she decisively swung her hand and flipped open the laptop on the table.
Zhang Ye took a look and said in surprise, "The leader likes pictures!"
Dong Shanshan smiled and waved her finger in the air. "Let me tell you, I can clearly say every leader's preferences, horoscope, blood type, and birth date!" She pointed at the screen. "This one likes to fish, so I dive into the water and hook fish one by one!"
Audience:
"Hanging fish?"
"Puchi!"
"Hahahaha!"
Dong Shanshan pointed again, "This one, he likes to play mahjong, so I gave him a teardrop to light up the cannon! As for this, I brought my great-grandfather's relic for him to wear. As for this, he likes me … "Stunned, Dong Shanshan immediately closed the laptop." So, Hao Jian … "
"Hahahaha!"
"Like you?"
"Aiyo, hahahaha!"
The audience burst into laughter!
Zhang Ye was also amused. "Hey, wait a minute. Why did you cover up the crucial part? I wanted to hear that part the most!"
"Hahahaha!"
"Alright!"
"Alright!"
The audience cheered!
Dong Shanshan beamed and said, "So, now you know how I got to this position, right?"
Zhang Ye nodded vigorously and said, "I know. Why else would I say that you're amazing, Chief? Your boot-licking skills are in your blood!"
Audience: "Hahaha!"
"Who are you talking about? Who are you talking about? "Dong Shanshan, who had just sat down, was unhappy. She pointed at him and complained," I'm talking about that mouth of yours! "
Zhang Ye hurriedly said, "Hey, pui pui pui. Why do you think I'm so bad at chatting? The moment I speak, I always make people angry. I'm also puzzled. I realize that every time we have a meeting, the leader will only nod and smile at you. Is it because you're pretty? "
Dong Shanshan sat as steady as Mount Tai and smiled smugly. "It's not just that!" Looking at him, she said, "Let me tell you, a meeting is about technique. When the leader speaks, or when he throws out his point of view, I'll immediately give it, eh?" She exaggeratedly made a questioning expression. "The leader thinks of it, so what? Are you doubting me? When he finishes speaking, I don't even know what he's talking about, but immediately … Oh!! "She revealed a look of realization and her mouth was agape!
Audience: "Hahahahaha!"
Dong Shanshan laughed and said, "I want the leader to feel that I've been baptized by his words and that I've been enlightened!"
After hearing that, Zhang Ye mimicked Dong Shanshan's expression and made an extremely ugly look of realization. "Oh!"
"Pfft!"
"Hey, that's too ugly!"
"Pfft!"
The audience cramped up with laughter!
Many of the Beijing Television staff in the audience were also amused. Zhang Ye's skit was actually the same as the audience. This was also the first time they had heard it, as there was no time for rehearsals at all for this skit!
Zhang Ye said in admiration, "Listening to your speech has subverted my outlook on life!"
Dong Shanshan said, "That's why I'm saying, Hao Jian, not only do you have to play well with the leader, you have to make it so that the leader is only willing to play with you. Whenever he thinks of playing, he will think of you. Whenever he thinks of you, he will feel his hands itch!"
Zhang Ye immediately said, "I understand now. You're trying to establish an image of me as someone who deserves a beating. Then if I do that, wouldn't I be able to become a full-time employee?"
Dong Shanshan laughed and said, "It's more than that." "See that? This office of mine will be yours from now on, Chief Hao?"
Zhang Ye hurriedly waved his hands. "Aiyo, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't!"
Dong Shanshan laughed again and said, "Chief Hao!"
Zhang Ye shuddered, "Aiyah, don't don't don't don't don't!"
Dong Shanshan pulled him over to the leather chair. "Chief Hao, Chief Hao, come over here. Sit down, sit down!"
Zhang Ye hurriedly said, "No, no, no!"
"Feel it!" Dong Shanshan pressed him down.
"No, no, no!"
"Sit down."
"Oh!!"
"Sit down again."
"Oh, oh, oh!!"
Zhang Ye had a look of enjoyment on his face.
The audience was overjoyed. "Pfft!"
Zhang Ye held onto the chair, not knowing what to do. "Aiyoyo, let's have a taste of what it's like to be a leader. Aiya, this chair is so comfortable. No wonder you always sleep at work. If I were to become a leader in the future, wouldn't I be sleeping forever with the world?"
Dong Shanshan smiled and said, "You can sleep however you want, Chief Hao."
Ring, ring, ring. A call came in.
Dong Shanshan answered, "Hello, ah, Chief Yao? Oh, you're coming over now? Alright, alright. Aiyo, that's great. I have good news waiting for you! "After hanging up, she laughed heartily." The chief will be here soon! "
Zhang Ye stood up. "That's great. Eh, now that he's here, where are we going to play?"
Dong Shanshan snapped her fingers. "I've already prepared everything for you!" She brought him to the side where there was a simple table tennis table. "The old chief has gone in. I've also taken care of his mahjong table for him. Ha, from now on, you guys can play here at my place. I'll be the referee for you." She set up a ping pong net. These props were all specially made. "Haha, Hao Jian, this is not an ordinary ping pong table for you. This is the ladder to heaven in your life!" She used a Northeastern accent to make fun of him.
The audience laughed, "Hahahahaha!"
Zhang Ye shook her hand. "You're our benefactor, Chief Ma, no, Chief Ma!"
Dong Shanshan quickly gave a sinister smile and said, "Aiyo, I don't deserve it! Chief Hao? "
Zhang Ye gave a cheeky smile. "It's only a matter of time, Chief Ma!"
Dong Shanshan was even more cheeky than him. "Aiyo, you can't do that, you can't do that, Chief Hao?"
The newcomer laughed maniacally, then shook hands and said, "Win-win! Win-win! "
The audience was having a great time watching this!
"Their acting is really good!"
"These two people are really good at messing around! Hahahaha! "
At this moment, the music started playing.
Dong Shanshan quickly lowered her head to do her makeup.
Meanwhile, Zhang Ye picked up a table tennis racket and started practicing by himself!
One ball.
Two balls.
Three balls.
Suddenly, a voice came from outside and shouted, "Whoever wants to play table tennis again in the future! I will punish that person! "
Dong Shanshan was stunned.
Zhang Ye was also stunned.
The atmosphere onstage changed all of a sudden!
The audience was amused.
"Hahahaha!"
"This is going to be fun to watch!"
"Who asked you two to mess around!"
"The chief is here!"
At this moment, Yao Jiancai, who was dressed in a suit and leather shoes, came out. His hair was moussed and he looked like a leader.
The audience immediately gave him a warm round of applause!
"Aiyo, Chief Yao, what's going on?" Dong Shanshan hurriedly went up to welcome him. She even avoided the chief's line of sight and desperately gestured to the other side!
Zhang Ye held the racket and did not dare to make any big movements. He carefully hid the racket.
Yao Jiancai's current demeanor was different from when he was performing crosstalk. He spoke very steadily and honestly. "I wonder who it was that found out that I like to play table tennis. Now, some of the comrades in the bureau are already practicing it during their working hours! What kind of behavior is this? "
Zhang Ye moved step by step as he carefully and nervously packed up the table tennis table. He reached out to remove the net from the table tennis table.
The audience was tickled beyond belief!
Dong Shanshan was still covering for Zhang Ye. "Tsk, Chief Yao, it's not a big deal to play table tennis."
Yao Jiancai said seriously, "Playing table tennis itself is not a big deal, but if you use it to cater to someone's interests, then that's evil!" When he turned around, he saw Zhang Ye holding a table tennis net.
The audience burst into laughter. "Hahahaha!"
But Zhang Ye's next move made the entire audience roar with laughter!
Zhang Ye was stunned for a moment. He reached out and hung the table tennis net around his neck. He picked up one end and even used it as a scarf to fling it behind him!
"Hahahaha!"
"Aiyo, hey!"
"Great!"
"Great!"
The audience gave thunderous applause!
Yao Jiancai walked over with his hands behind his back and looked at him from the corner of his eyes. "A scarf?" He pulled at the thing around his neck and said, "It even comes with weights?"
Zhang Ye quibbled, "It's very windy. My mom is afraid that it might get blown off."
The audience laughed, "Ahahahahaha!"
Dong Shanshan quickly came over to help. "Hey, this is a new comrade from our unit. Come, Chief, let's sit down and talk." She helped him over to the sofa.
Yao Jiancai sat down on the sofa and looked at Dong Shanshan, saying, "Chief Ma, you're an old comrade. Now that there's such a problem with our unit's work style, shouldn't you take a leading role?"
Dong Shanshan immediately sat up straight and said righteously, "I'm talking about them! I'm saying that no matter how much you practice, you won't be able to reach the level of Chief Yao. Chief Yao was a champion every year in his previous unit! "
"Hey, don't flatter me!" Yao Jiancai paused for a moment, then said, "… I was a runner-up one year."
These words made the crowd burst into laughter again!
"Pfft!"
"Hahahaha!"
"Old Yao, that's enough!"
Then Yao Jiancai sighed and said, "Actually, I'm not that good at table tennis! Tell me, how did I get the championship every year? "With a wave of his hand, he said," It's all bullsh * t! "
Dong Shanshan flattered, "It can't be all bullsh * t. Didn't you just say that you were a runner-up once?"
Yao Jiancai looked at her and nodded. "Yes." Then he paused and said, "I was a deputy chief that year!"
The audience laughed until their stomachs hurt!
"Hahahahaha!"
"Aiyo, I really can't take it anymore!"
"This is too fucking funny!"
"It's like a sudden burden! Hahaha! "
"This is so fun!"
… …
Offstage.
In a work area not far from the stage.
Chang Xiaoliang did not laugh from the beginning to the end. Many of the other members of the production team were the same. It wasn't that the skit wasn't funny, but that they had forgotten to laugh. They were all looking at the trio of Chang Xiaoliang, Dong Shanshan, and Yao Jiancai on stage in shock!
They were really shocked!
Chang Xiaoliang was silent for a long time. He looked to the side and said, "Are you sure that the three of them have never acted in a skit before?"
The assistant director gave a wry smile. "We've really never acted in a skit before!"
Chang Xiaoliang asked again, "Are you sure that this skit was written by Teacher Little Zhang just an hour ago?"
Another female assistant director said, "Yes, it was written within an hour. I've already asked them and they said that Teacher Zhang did not even have a script for the skit before this. It was all written by him on the spot!"
"Then I really want to know one thing right now!" The more Chang Xiaoliang spoke, the more excited he became. "An hour ago, they wrote a script and memorized their lines on the spot. The three of them are amateurs who have never acted in a skit before and didn't even have time for a formal rehearsal, so how … did they manage to come up with such a wonderful skit!?"
The production team: "…"
No one could answer him!
Because they did not know either!
To them, this was something that they simply could not understand!
Getting Zhang Ye to save the day was purely because they had no other choice. It was purely a last resort. To be honest, Chang Xiaoliang and the others were only hoping that Zhang Ye could finish performing the skit. They had never thought that Zhang Ye would come up with some kind of classic, because everyone knew that it was impossible! But when this "Playing What They Like" came out, they were all a little dumbfounded! This work … was simply too mature! How did this look like something that had been written on the spot? How could these three amateurs who had never acted in a skit before? The characters, the performance, the script, the jokes, the rhythm, the idea, the depth, all of it was there!
This was clearly a skit on the level of Central TV's Spring Festival Gala!!
Was this Zhang Ye?
Was this Zhang Ye when he got serious?
Looking at the entire folk arts world, looking at the entire entertainment industry, who else could be like this!?
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