[Hello, Joey. When I received your last letter, I was busy applying for a university, so the time between replies was a bit long. Sorry for the wait. Yesterday, my parents received a call from your father, saying that you were sick a while ago. I don't know if it's serious, but I hope you'll have recovered by the time you receive this letter.
When the dust settles, I'll come to see you. Actually, I'm very concerned about your physical condition, so you can try to write a manual on how to get along with you and send it to me. Let me familiarize myself with it in advance and avoid any possible mistakes.
I hope our first meeting will be perfect.]
Because of the end of the letter, Le Zhishi was convinced that the person on the other end of the letter was a perfectionist.
First of all, his handwriting was very beautiful. From the proper style of his childhood to the mature style of his youth, Le Zhishi had seriously imitated every stage. Therefore, his Chinese handwriting was very similar to Song Yu's, but not exactly the same.
Secondly, Song Yu's paper was always spotless, without a trace of wrinkles or excessive odor. Every time he signed, there was almost no difference between his signature, as if it was printed by a machine. If there was a quality control for letters, Song Yu's letter would be the best.
Finally, he hoped to receive a request for instructions on how to get along with him, which would highlight his characteristic of not wanting to make mistakes.
Thinking of this, Le Zhishi excitedly got out of bed, sat in front of the desk, turned on the desk lamp, and quickly wrote down information about himself on other waste paper: his allergens, the medicine he took, the thunder he hated … But in the end, Le Zhishi suddenly felt a kind of timidity.
Song Yu didn't want to make mistakes.
Then, does my feelings for him count as a mistake that he needs to avoid?
This assumption made the teenage Le Zhishi confused for the first time.
He didn't know how he fell in love with an older brother who only existed behind a pen and paper. It sounded a bit strange, like a plot from a novel from the last century. But he thought that many people in this era would also fall in love with virtual characters, fall in love with a carefully created image on social media. In comparison, he wasn't even that pitiful. After all, Song Yu was a real person. As long as he wanted to, he could break the rules and see him at any time.
Moreover, Song Yu was so outstanding that he was willing to listen to him and continued to care for him during his growth period. No matter how strange his ideas were in the letter, Song Yu could understand them and give him a steady stream of new inspiration and inspiration.
He was the person in the world who was the furthest away from Le Zhishi, but also the person closest to him.
How could he not like Song Yu?
Once he knew his feelings, he began to worry. Although he was relatively confident in himself, he also clearly knew that he was imperfect. There was nothing wrong with being gay, but the probability of it happening to him and Song Yu was probably close to zero.
He fantasized more about Song Yu than anyone else in the world. At night, he would listen to the sound of the wind outside the window and imagine Song Yu's appearance. Every Chinese person he had seen was not as good-looking as Song Yu.
When he read the letter, Le Zhishi often imagined that Song Yu was speaking to him. The Chinese language was such a beautiful tonal language. The combination of the four tones made speaking as beautiful as singing. Song Yu must also have a voice that could produce these wonderful tones. So Le Zhishi worked very hard to learn the tones, but it was really difficult. Other than his father, he could hardly find a practitioner who could speak standard Chinese. So he always made mistakes. He even wrote in the letter that if he couldn't distinguish between Qu Sheng and Yang Ping, he would pronounce Song Yu as Song Yu. Then, the image of Song Yu would be a cute little fish.
Song Yu replied, "I believe you can distinguish. You are a very smart student. But it's not bad to be a little fish. "
Seeing such a reply, Le Zhishi was both happy and sad. He vaguely felt that Song Yu was indulging him, but he wasn't sure if the source of this indulgence was love, concern between friends, or even encouragement for a younger brother he knew.
The more he thought about it, the worse the situation became.
When he was sick, Le Zhishi's confusion and anxiety would worsen. He wrote many letters in a daze and discarded many of them. But because he didn't want Song Yu to wait, he dragged his sick body and packed the letters on the last day to send them out.
He didn't expect to send them to the wrong person.
This disrupted all of Le Zhishi's original plans. Before the first meeting, he had to be mysterious enough so that Song Yu would look forward to meeting him as much as he did. He had to be healthy and energetic to test whether Song Yu would be against the same sex. If he wasn't, then he had to work hard and try to pursue him …
So, when he deliberately left London early after knowing that Song Yu was coming, he also made an excuse not to pick him up at the airport because the airport wasn't a romantic place for a chance encounter. When Song Yu arrived, he also didn't choose to stand at the door and greet him foolishly.
These plans that Le Zhishi had been thinking about for a long time were all destroyed because of a missent letter.
The sea breeze blew the hair on his forehead to his cheeks and stuck to the bridge of his nose. Le Zhishi awkwardly pushed it away with his fingers and suppressed the panic in his eyes. But he still couldn't hold back and quickly blinked a few times in the sea breeze.
The tide surged up again, this time reaching one-third of his calves.
Seeing that he didn't answer for a moment, Song Yu spoke again, "Was I too direct?"
He guessed that Le Zhishi would deny it and then stumble to explain something.
But things were always unexpected.
Le Zhishi looked annoyed and even a little discouraged. He tightened his jaw and pursed his lips. After a few seconds, he looked up at Song Yu and blamed him in a sulky tone, "Yes, it's because of you."
"I carefully avoided those mistakes, but it was no use at all. You still found out."
For some reason, Song Yu felt that their conversation was very familiar, as if he had heard it somewhere before. It was a hallucination. He even had a premonition that Le Zhishi might cry.
He hoped not.
But this time, Le Zhishi didn't cry.
"You ruined my plan." His complaining tone was familiar to Song Yu because when he read his letter, Song Yu had imagined this voice countless times. The reality was more pleasant than he imagined.
Le Zhishi lifted a foot slightly and kicked in the water, as if to relieve his frustration. The water splashed on Song Yu's pants. Then he raised his face and looked directly at Song Yu with his clear amber eyes. "I like you, and I want to pursue you."
As if he felt that he was being too rash, Le Zhishi called him by his name like an adult. "Song Yu, I'm very serious." In order to be more serious, he even switched to his native language, which was more accurate and infallible. "You know, I'm not a perfect guy. That's why I want to use a perfect plan to make you like me. At least the success rate will be higher this way."
He spoke English much faster, and it was more like he was just blurting things out. He was direct and frank, and many of his little expressions were a little exaggerated. "Although you must be wondering what kind of freak I am to fall in love with someone just because he writes to me every month. But you should think that I like the you you show in the letter, and not be attracted by other appearances. This means that I'm not like other people who only care about appearances. "
Song Yu seemed to think that what he said was a little funny, and he made an expression that was trying to hold back his laughter.
So Le Zhishi felt offended. "Is it funny?"
Song Yu shook his head casually and said to him in English, "No. I just think you're very cute. "
Hearing this, Le Zhishi's ears turned red again. His heart was beating very fast, just like it did every time he silently read Song Yu's letter. He repeatedly chewed on the meaning behind the letter, and found a little bit of obscure evidence that Song Yu also had feelings for him. But Song Yu's writing was always so fair. Those words that were so subtle that they could hardly be called hints drenched Le Zhishi like hot rain on many nights. From inside to outside, there was no place that wasn't wet and surging with vitality.
At this moment, because of Song Yu's praise, the hot rain poured down, and Le Zhishi couldn't resist it. He almost collapsed in the rain.
"Am … am I cute?" His language switching system was messed up due to nervousness, and it became a mixture of Chinese and English. He even had a very strange accent when speaking Chinese. This was something he couldn't tolerate doing in front of Song Yu.
Song Yu's smile became more obvious. He switched to Chinese like a gentleman after Le Zhishi. "Yes, you're very cute. And very noble. You don't like my appearance. You're not superficial. "
"I like your appearance too." Le Zhishi couldn't help but correct him and remind him, "I praised you when I first saw you. But liking your appearance isn't superficial or unnoble. You can't blame a heart that loves you. "
"Le Zhishi, your translation accent is too obvious." Song Yu acted like a strict Chinese tutor. "I told you a long time ago, don't learn Chinese by translating poems and novels from English to Chinese."
But Le Zhishi was very firm and didn't change the topic. "It's fine as long as you understand. Song Yu, do you understand? I like you very much. "
The afternoon sun made the fine hairs on his face translucent and soft. Just as he finished speaking, he raised his hands again, his palms facing Song Yu. "Don't be in a hurry to reject me. Even if you don't have that kind of interest in me now, it doesn't matter. I can pursue you."
Suddenly, Song Yu placed his broad and dry palms on his hands. His gaze also fell on Le Zhishi's eyes. His handsome face was calm.
"How?" He asked first, then continued, "I heard that British people mind other people stepping into their private space. So your way of pursuing me is to let me sleep in your bed? Or let me see you take a shower shirtless? Or take me to see the LGBT community's Rainbow Tour to get some inspiration? "
"Le Zhishi." His magnetic voice called out his name completely. He asserted in a very firm tone, as if announcing some kind of judgment. "This is not pursuing, this is seduction."
Le Zhishi was stunned. For a moment, he mistakenly thought that he was going to have an attack. Otherwise, he wouldn't have had difficulty breathing, sweating, and palpitations.
He subconsciously said no and wanted to deny it. But before he pulled his hand away, Song Yu bent his fingers and embedded them between Le Zhishi's fingers like a gear.
"Are you still not going to admit it? The fish has already bitten the hook. "
"What?" Le Zhishi frowned in confusion, then said in English that it was impossible. As if he was afraid of misunderstanding, he asked him, "Don't use metaphors."
Song Yu shook off the hand that was intertwined with his fingers and responded to Le Zhishi's words completely. "You don't have to pursue me, because I don't intend to reject you. I have that kind of interest in you."
He raised his eyebrows. "I like you, understand?"
Le Zhishi felt like he was drowning in this shining sea.
He felt Song Yu's thumb stroking and rubbing the skin on the back of his hand, and suddenly he pulled his hand out reflexively. A certain sensitive nerve in his body was touched by Song Yu. His face flushed, and his limbs went weak.
"Then now … we …" He was a little flustered, as if the person who confessed his love just now wasn't him.
"If someone comes over to hit on us again." Song Yu curled the corner of his mouth. "You can tell her that we're a couple."
Everything was like a dream on a summer night. Le Zhishi successfully got the object of his admiration on the first day he reunited with her. At that moment, he felt like the luckiest person in the world. But because he didn't plan what to do after he got her, compared to the confession, everything after that seemed clumsy.
He took Song Yu to the coastline. When he saw a couple lying on the beach kissing, he was so nervous that he didn't dare to look at Song Yu. He said to him, "I'll take you to see the white cliffs," as if he was completing a tour guide's mission. Then he got on his bike as if he was escaping.
Song Yu didn't make fun of him. He calmly followed Le Zhishi to many of the places he had planned. They saw the white cliffs, the mint-colored art galleries, and the rainbow-colored buildings together. They shuttled through the streets and alleys of this artistic seaside town and rode home together in the evening.
They tacitly didn't tell their parents about the change in their relationship because it was too fragile. It was like a newborn baby who needed to be protected by swaddling clothes.
"Joey, your face is so red from the sun." Olivia was holding a big bowl of Caesar salad. "You should put on your hat before going out."
Le Zhishi agreed hesitantly. Then he smelled the aroma and went into the kitchen. "Is this for me?"
Lin Rong smiled and said, "These are pearl meatballs. You should like them. Come on, try one. " She forked one and fed it to Le Zhishi. He swallowed it and realized that it was very hot, but he couldn't bear to spit it out. He just stood there and exhaled hot air with his mouth open.
He looked so silly that it was cute. Song Yu walked over, poured a glass of ice water, and handed it to Le Zhishi. Then he went upstairs alone and changed his clothes.
After just one dinner, Le Zhishi was obsessed with Lin Rong's cooking. It even made Olivia jealous. "Why don't we just send you to Uncle's house?"
Yue Yi smiled and took a sip of white wine. "That's a good idea. Old Song is better at teaching children than I am."
"Don't flatter me." Song Jin also drank some wine and his face was red. "You're not even asking if the child is willing to make such a joke."
"I'm willing." Le Zhishi nodded seriously. "Can I really?"
"Hahahahaha, he's the most serious one!"
"I think you're really seduced by the food."
The adults were joking, but Le Zhishi's ears were red as he secretly glanced at Song Yu. That was the bait that would lure him away.
That night, Le Zhishi couldn't sleep. He missed Song Yu very much. Even though he had only been face to face with him for less than ten hours, he felt that he had liked him for many years and many times.
He thought that ten hours was too short and that the excited neurotransmitters in his body were messing up. Perhaps it would be better after some time, but ten days had passed, and 30 days had passed, and this feeling was still very deep.
Song Yu would enter school at the end of the summer to study geology, which he liked. So Le Zhishi wanted to make good use of his hard-earned vacation. During these days, they went to Shakespeare's former residence, to Burton on the Water to feed the black swan, to the "Garden of Eden" in Cornwall, and to touch the bricks of the ancient castle with him, touching and caressing each other's fingers on the bricks.
When they held hands, Le Zhishi's palms would sweat nervously, as if his body was releasing mucus in an attempt to stick to Song Yu's hand. When they hugged, Song Yu's pleasant smell would entangle his thoughts. He would unconsciously use his forehead to rub the skin on the side of Song Yu's neck, resisting the urge to kiss him. And Song Yu's palm would slowly press and caress his shoulder blades and waist through the fabric. The feeling was extremely unbearable.
On sunny days, he would run by the sea in swimming trunks. On rainy days, he would wear a transparent raincoat over his shirt. In the foggy pasture, he would look after the newborn lambs with him.
Late at night, when the cicadas were chirping madly, Le Zhishi's parents fell asleep. Le Zhishi sat cross-legged on the bed, opened the box he brought, and flipped through Song Yu's letters, as well as the many love poems he had written for Song Yu.
Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Le Zhishi cautiously asked who it was.
"It's me." Song Yu stood at the door. "Can I come in?"
As soon as Le Zhishi heard his voice, he stupidly said, "Of course." As soon as Song Yu entered the room, he saw him holding a big box in a panic. In the end, he gave up on hiding it.
Song Yu walked towards him. "What's this?" He moved closer to take a closer look. "My letter?"
"Yes." Le Zhishi nodded.
Song Yu stood beside his bed and looked down at him like a refined gentleman. "Why are you looking at this now?"
"I missed you." Le Zhishi was very honest. He smiled at him. "Then you came over."
Song Yu pinched his chin, but didn't take any further action. Le Zhishi was reluctant to let him touch any part of his body. It was a chain reaction, and the numbness spread from his chin to his index finger and toes.
"Why did you come over?" Le Zhishi grabbed his hand and asked him.
Song Yu looked at the night sky outside the balcony, and then back to his shining eyes. "Do you want to see the stars?"
His invitation was obviously very ordinary, but Le Zhishi felt that it was particularly romantic. So he readily agreed, put on his shirt, and quietly went downstairs with Song Yu. The two of them lay on the lawn in the backyard. The sharp blades of grass rubbed against Le Zhishi's cheeks and neck, just like Song Yu's touch.
The stars in the night sky of the countryside were particularly bright. Song Yu pointed at a slightly red star. "This is Mars."
"It's very vivid." Le Zhishi commented on its Chinese name, and then took the initiative to say, "I want to know your constellation. It's Scorpio."
Song Yu smiled. "It's difficult to see with the naked eye."
"Then forget it. Anyway, I've checked. You really do look like a Scorpio. " Le Zhishi continued to talk about the various characteristics of Scorpio. It was mysterious, energetic, and possessive.
"And sexy." He turned his face and looked at Song Yu lying next to him.
Song Yu also looked at him quietly for a while. "It's so strange."
"What's strange?"
He reached out a hand and stroked Le Zhishi's cheek. "When I'm with you, I always feel that a certain moment is very familiar, as if I've experienced it before."
Le Zhishi had the same feeling, so his eyes widened slightly.
"Maybe it's a parallel universe." Le Zhishi tried to give him an explanation. "Do you believe in the theory of multiple universes? Maybe in another universe, we also know each other. Maybe it was me who confessed to you, saying that you look like a Scorpio … "
He stared at the night sky, and his regret deepened. "Maybe in that universe, I grew up with you. We ate together every day, went to school together, and the first person we saw when we woke up in the morning and the last person we saw before we went to bed was each other. "
Song Yu also chuckled.
That would be too blissful.
He could have Le Zhishi's childhood, his lively and lively adolescence, and his future.
Le Zhishi leaned closer to Song Yu and rested his head on his shoulder. "I hope that we are also blissful in that universe."
"Definitely." Song Yu's tone was certain.
The hydrangeas emitted a very faint fragrance, and Le Zhishi, who was lying on his back, felt dizzy as if he had secretly drunk wine. After a moment of silence, Song Yu suddenly turned around. His face blocked half of the starry sky in front of Le Zhishi, and his dark eyes were like a soft abyss.
"Tell me … between me in that universe and me now, who kissed you first?"
Le Zhishi's fingers grabbed a blade of grass, and his eyes widened. He could feel that he was so nervous that he almost squeezed out the fragrant juice. His breathing was irregular, and he even forgot to breathe.
His fingers pinched Le Zhishi's lower lip, and the pad of his thumb moved his soft lips. He asked in a coaxing tone.
"Do you want to let me win once?"
Le Zhishi said yes in a low voice, and then closed his eyes.
His heart madly jumped out of his chest, as if it was about to shrink to the size of a cherry. From his chest to his throat, and then to the tip of his tongue, it was fed into Song Yu's mouth in a frenzy, where it was crushed, ground, and swallowed by his bright and clean teeth. Thus, he completely belonged to this person.
In the boundless darkness, the blade of grass was roughly pressed down and rose up again, like the hope and desire of the dead coming back to life, in a cycle.
"I like you, I like you so much." Le Zhishi seized every opportunity to confess and express his love to Song Yu. He was sure that he would do the same in any universe. And Song Yu released the strongest possessiveness for him. Their bones and flesh were tightly attached to each other.
As the night cooled down, they went from lying down to sitting up, to strolling in the dark backyard, holding each other's hands.
"You took a shower here." Song Yu pointed to a cluster of hydrangea shrubs with great precision. "It's very beautiful."
"These are my flowers. Of course they're beautiful. There are also snow mountain roses." Le Zhishi was still very proud. As he spoke, he led Song Yu away because he wanted to take him to see the flowers in the front yard, which were also his proudest work.
"I'm talking about you." Song Yu was rarely frank. He would never forget Le Zhishi's gaze that day.
"You're many times more beautiful than I imagined."
Le Zhishi was easily nervous by his words. "Okay …" They walked through the house, so Le Zhishi lowered his voice. "It means that your imagination isn't rich enough."
"It's already very rich." Song Yu rubbed his fingers and walked to the front yard with him.
Le Zhishi stood in front of the rose bushes and looked at him sideways. "What are you thinking about?"
Song Yu raised his eyebrows slightly. "Do you want to know the day or night?"
"I …" This time, he quickly understood Song Yu's hint.
"Your Chinese has improved."
"You …"
Song Yu stared at the snow-white roses and interrupted him again. "I heard from Uncle Le today that before you were born, my parents and your parents had an agreement that if you were a girl, you would marry me."
"But I'm a boy." Le Zhishi emphasized.
"It doesn't matter. Anyway, you've been mine since you were an embryo." Song Yu smiled and asked Le Zhishi, "Are these flowers the wedding bouquet you planted for yourself?"
"Song Yu!" Le Zhishi was a little anxious by his teasing.
But the flirter reached out his hand unhurriedly and picked the most beautiful rose. He broke it off and removed the thorns on it.
Finally, he placed it next to Le Zhishi's ear.
Under the moonlight, his lover's face was more peaceful and beautiful than the plump snow-white roses. Song Yu couldn't help but kiss his soft cheek and hold it like a treasure. He pressed his forehead against his smooth forehead and said gently.
"I love you, Le Zhishi."
"I love you in any universe."
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