Lanterns hung on the Feiyao Pavilion in picturesque disorder. They were made of bamboo and paper, like a river of stars flowing in the long night. Fine snow rustled and fell in the brilliant light of the lanterns, covering the vermilion carved railings in a thin layer.
Two women stood in the light of the lanterns. One was wearing a red dress embroidered with butterflies. She was smiling sweetly and saying something. The other was wearing a light yellow dress embroidered with plum blossoms and bamboo. She was standing by the vermilion railings, looking up at a light fish-shaped lantern.
Although he had lost his memory, Gu Mang could almost immediately recognize that the latter was the Murong Meng Ze.
Just now in the main hall, he felt that Mo Xi's expression was not right. He had known Mo Xi for so long, but he had never seen him so attentive to anyone. At that time, Gu Mang thought that this legendary "Princess Meng Ze" should be an extremely beautiful woman. But now, seeing her in the light of the flying snow, he felt that using the word "beautiful" to describe this person seemed to be too shallow.
The Murong Meng Ze's figure was not outstanding, but she was tall and elegant, with a sense of spring and snow. The lanterns shone on her delicate and white face, emitting a jade-like luster. Not to mention her white jade-like neck, which stretched out from her collar like a flower stalk. Her slender neck made her look even more elegant.
"… Meng Ze."
The Murong Meng Ze turned around and was startled. Then, she smiled and said, "Ah, Brother Mo. Long time no see. "
The woman in red beside her was her personal maid, Yue Niang. Yue Niang also curtsied to Mo Xi and said with a smile, "Greetings to Lord Xi He. Long live Lord Xi He."
Mo Xi walked towards Meng Ze. "Why are you standing here? Aren't you cold? "
"I just recovered from the Hot Spring Palace. Such beautiful lanterns only come once a year. "Meng Ze said with a smile." It's okay. "
Since she had said so, Mo Xi didn't know how to persuade her. But at this moment, a hand suddenly reached up and touched her ear.
"Let's go back. It's cold outside."
After all, Meng Ze's body was priceless. No one dared to offend her like this. She subconsciously took a step back. But when she saw who the person behind Mo Chime was, her expression changed.
"Marshal Gu …"
As a former Chong Hua man who was best at winning the hearts of girls, Gu Mang still had some tenderness towards women in his bones. Therefore, even though he was vaguely unhappy that Mo Xi was so close to this woman, he still said kindly, "It's snowing so heavily. Your ears are red from the cold."
Murong Meng Ze was at a loss for words.
Even though she already knew about Gu Mang's situation before she came back, she still couldn't accept being so close to this traitor.
Yue Niang was a hot-tempered person. She couldn't stand being stung. She said angrily to Gu Mang, "You traitor, how dare you touch my master with your dirty hands? If it wasn't for you … "
"That's enough." Murong Meng Ze interrupted her softly, "Don't say anymore."
Yue Niang pursed her lips, "Princess, why are you always so good-tempered … I, I feel wronged for you!"
"What nonsense are you talking about?" Murong Meng Ze said softly but with some dignity, "Yue Niang, stop fooling around. Go inside and warm up."
"… Yes …" Yue Niang reluctantly agreed. But before she left, she glared at Gu Mang fiercely. Her cheeks were puffed up with anger.
Murong Meng Ze sent Yue Niang away and turned to ask Mo Xi, "Is he … living in your residence now?"
It was self-evident who he was referring to. Mo Que grunted in acknowledgment.
Murong Meng Ze lowered her eyelids and sighed, "… I don't want to say much. You are someone who has been injured. There are some things that you need to pay more attention to."
"I know."
Gu Mang didn't quite understand the meaning behind Meng Ze's words. He only felt that she should be a good person since she didn't let that fierce girl continue to abuse him. Coincidentally, a plum blossom fell from the side of the jade table and landed on Meng Ze's hair. So Gu Mang reached out to remove it for her …
But before his hand could touch Meng Ze, it was grabbed by Mo Xi.
Gu Mang said, "There's a flower on her head …"
Mo Xi interrupted him. Her voice was calm, "This is Princess Meng Ze. Salute. "
Meng Ze said, "Forget it. His divine sense is damaged. It doesn't matter if he salutes or not. "
Gu Mang didn't say anything. His blue eyes moved left and right. He looked at Meng Ze and then at Mo Xi. Finally, he slowly lowered his head, "I just want to help …"
"…" Mo Xi paused and decided to end the conversation. So she said, "Go back to the main hall first. I have something to say to her. "
She chased her away and he chased him away.
So he was the same as Yue Niang. They were both going to be sent away?
Gu Mang looked at Mo Xi and Meng Ze without saying anything. After a while, he silently turned around.
He had always been gentle and tolerant to girls. He had been like this before he lost his memory. Now, he hadn't changed much.
He always felt that they were weak, delicate, and beautiful. They deserved the best protection. He was a man. He should give them the best and be courteous to them.
Therefore, he felt that Mo Xi was right. Princess Meng Ze was a princess. She was a very outstanding female. She deserved to be respected and taken care of.
And he was dirty. He was a slave. He really shouldn't have touched her.
But for some reason, he felt very sad in his heart. When he returned to the main hall, he rubbed his fingers that had turned red from the cold and covered his ears … At this time, there were many guests in the main hall, but when he looked around, he didn't see any familiar faces.
This situation made Gu Mang feel a strong sense of helplessness. It was like abandoning a dog in the wilderness. He instinctively turned back to look for Mo Quench, the only reliable person he could rely on. But the moment he turned back, he realized that it was Mo Quench who had sent him away.
He had nowhere to go. So he could only stand by the door of the balcony and look at the two people in the lantern light.
Under the lanterns, Mo Xi lowered his head and spoke to Meng Ze. Meng Ze kept laughing. Sometimes she coughed. Later, Mo Xi seemed to ask her something. Meng Ze covered her mouth and coughed. Then she shook her head.
Gu Mang couldn't hear anything because they were too far away. But Mo Xi's facial features were deep. He could see his expression clearly.
Mo Xi obviously sighed. Then he took off his military uniform and handed it to the Murong Meng Ze.
He didn't personally put the clothes on Meng Ze, nor did he do anything else. But for some reason, when Gu Mang saw this scene, his heart suddenly ached.
Gu Mang frowned and pressed his hand to his heart … before he could figure out what kind of emotion this was, some of Lu Li's strange words flashed through his mind.
"Senior Brother, I really like you."
It was Mo Xi's voice. It was as young and sincere as it was in the dream.
"His Majesty has appointed me as Lord Xi He. In the future, I don't have to look at other people's faces. I will do what I promised you. I want to be together with you legally."
"Gu Mang, I will give you a home. Wait for me, okay?"
"Believe me …"
His heart ached more and more. It was as if a thorn had taken root and sprouted, then was suddenly pulled out.
The words in his ears hadn't faded, but the beauty in front of him had become a pair.
For a moment, Gu Mang's body was bent because of the pain. He held onto the balcony door frame and lowered his head to catch his breath.
He couldn't quite understand the meaning of these words that he suddenly remembered. He also couldn't remember the cause and effect of that time, the scene of the covenant.
But this pain …
And his feelings at that time, were so clearly engraved in his bones. So much so that even his breathing became a little irregular.
Subconsciously, he felt that this pain wasn't without warning. It was as if in the past, he had already predicted that this day would come. It was as if he had never taken Mo Xi's promise seriously.
Even though the future that Mo Xi had described to him was so good, the young man in his memory seemed to have promised his entire life, his heart, his passion and all his love in an instant.
Gu Mang could feel that he had once wanted to believe it.
When he thought of the pain, the trembling, the fragmentation, he wanted to hold Mo Xi's hand. He wanted to throw caution to the wind and believe in him and love him without caring about anything.
But when it came to the end, he was still afraid.
Mo Xi was a proud son of God, a descendant of the Chong Hua nobility, a descendant of four generations of generals.
And he was just a small figure. This love was too heavy. He couldn't bear it.
He knew that Mo Xi would grow up one day. He would understand that his feelings for him were just a moment of impulse in his youth. A lifetime was very long. The person who could accompany him for the rest of his life wouldn't be a lousy and lowly slave.
But he didn't seem to have confided these words to Mo Xi back then. But now he remembered — it turned out that he had been afraid at that time.
It seemed that if he had said it, he would have lost too badly. He didn't have much to begin with. He couldn't lose his heart.
His heart might not mean much to the aristocrats. They could hurt it, play with it, abandon it, or even crush it into powder.
However, to him, this tiny little heart was his entire life's worth.
So Mo Xi could love him. He could lose his head and play taboo with him.
But he couldn't afford to love him. Although he didn't want to admit it, life was like this. He couldn't avoid the truth just by closing his eyes.
His life was too short.
He couldn't afford to give Mo Xi what he wanted.
He couldn't afford to give Mo Xi what he wanted.
The best position for him was to stand at the edge of the Jade Stage, in a dark and inconspicuous corner. He could take a look at the romance that had nothing to do with him.
Then he could smile …
But Gu Mang couldn't smile. He vaguely knew that he should smile. There was a deep-rooted instinct that protected him. But after all, he was no longer the Gu Mang of the past.
He couldn't smile.
He turned his head away. He didn't dare to look at the situation on the terrace. He turned and ran to the edge of the flowing banquet table. He stood there and calmed his throbbing heart.
After a while, more and more people came to attend the banquet. Gu Mang, a convicted felon, stood there alone. It was inevitable that he attracted a lot of attention. A few people who had blood feuds with Gu Mang stared at him. If it wasn't for the fact that they were in the wrong place, they probably would have rushed up to eat Gu Mang alive.
After Gu Mang slowly calmed down, he felt that something wasn't right. He looked around. All he saw were cold and hateful faces. So he hurriedly grabbed something from the flowing banquet table. Like a rat that everyone wanted to beat up, he fled in a hurry. Finally, he found an inconspicuous corner and squatted down.
Only then did he realize that the things he grabbed weren't delicious.
His foraging ability was really terrible. The table was full of dishes, but he only took two pieces of scallion sesame seed cake.
There were scallions, and they were cold …
But at this point, he couldn't be picky. Gu Mang lowered his head and took small bites of the biscuit. As he ate silently, a warm voice suddenly rang out behind him. "Gu Mang? Why are you here? "
Gu Mang turned around with the sesame seed cake in his mouth. He saw Jiang Yexue sitting in a wooden wheelchair. He was looking at him with a slightly surprised expression.
It was the man who put on the "necklace" for him …
Gu Mang breathed a sigh of relief. He didn't have much malice towards this person. He even felt that he was friendly. So he bit on the cake and whispered, "It's not an eyesore here."
Jiang Yexue knew what kind of attitude other people would have towards him. He sighed, "Where's Lord Xi He?"
"He's with the princess."
"I see. No wonder he would leave you alone … "
Gu Mang swallowed a mouthful of sesame seed cake and asked in a low voice, "Why are you here? Are you not likable? "
Jiang Yexue smiled and said, "You can say that."
He glanced at the distance. Yue Chenqing was talking to his fourth uncle with a smile. He looked radiant, but Murong Chuyi ignored him as usual. He had an indifferent expression on his face. He didn't know if he was listening or not.
Jiang Yexue looked at him for a while, then turned his gaze away and said, "I'm not likable either."
Gu Mang moved his seat to make space for him.
The two of them silently looked at the fine snow outside the window. Gu Mang suddenly glanced at his legs and asked, "Why are you sitting there?"
"… I was injured during the war. I can't stand up anymore."
Gu Mang didn't speak immediately. He took a few more bites of the sesame seed cake. He couldn't stand the taste of scallion oil, so he suddenly handed the cake to Jiang Yexue, "Do you want to eat?"
Jiang Yexue, "…"
After a few moments of silence, Jiang Yexue sighed, "You're still the same as before."
Gu Mang widened his eyes slightly, "You knew me before?"
Jiang Yexue smiled, "… Who doesn't know you?"
Gu Mang said, "I … don't understand."
"I did know you before. Me, you, Lord Xi, and Lu Zhanxing often worked together to conquer the north and south. " Jiang Yexue glanced at the sesame seed cake in Gu Mang's hand as he spoke, "You also liked to give us things you couldn't eat back then."
Gu Mang looked at him in a daze, "So you're saying that you're also my old friend?"
"Yes." Jiang Yexue said, "We went through life and death together." He sighed softly, "So I can't hate you."
Gu Mang lowered his eyes and said, "But Mo Xi hates me."
Jiang Yexue smiled softly. His black eyes looked at the night sky with a serene and transparent luster, "Although you're right, I'm afraid he's the one who doesn't want to hate you the most in this world."
"… Is that so?"
"Yes."
The snowflakes on the window lattice were soaked orange by the light in the hall.
Jiang Yexue adjusted the cold clothes on his shoulders and admired the snow with Gu Mang for a while, saying, "He actually treated you well in the past."
Gu Mang didn't say anything.
Jiang Yexue's voice was slow and deep, "When you were trapped, he wanted to save you even if it meant risking his life. When you were seriously injured and unconscious, he didn't get off the bed for a few days and nights to watch over you. When you received a reward, he was happier than when he received a merit. When you told jokes … he was such a serious person, but he sat among the soldiers and watched you. When you finished telling jokes with joy, he was the first to laugh. "
"But you don't remember any of this."
After all, he was a person who had gone through hardships and seen through life and death. He didn't have any heavy emotions mixed in. He just talked about the past calmly as if he was talking to an old friend.
His tone and expression were both light.
But Gu Mang fell into a trance between his words. He seemed to catch some vague shadows, some fragments of the past — in a crowded and lively tavern, the atmosphere was warm, and the soldiers were noisy.
He stood on a chair, laughing and chatting with the people below.
His line of sight moved quickly. He couldn't remember the cheerful and noisy faces below. But when he looked up, he saw the young man sitting next to the wine cabinet.
His back was straight, and his gaze was gentle. He stared at him intently across the lively crowd.
That moment of heartbeat was awakened again at this moment.
And those vows he just remembered. Although he didn't choose to believe them in the past, at least he could feel that Mo Xi was sincere when he said them —
"I really like you."
"I'll give you a home."
"Wait for me …"
Gu Mang closed his eyes. He didn't say anything for a while.
Jiang Yexue said, "If you didn't abandon him, hurt him, and touch his bottom line and reverse scale, he wouldn't hate you. He has been protecting you all this time. He was willing to shield you from the storm outside. But you stabbed him under his feet. "
Gu Mang's heart trembled.
Was it?
Was it like this …
He remembered how Mo Xi held his hand tightly, pressed it against his chest and whispered.
Mo Xi said, "You almost took my life."
"People's hearts are made of flesh. He has protected you for too long. He has given everything he can. He is an aristocrat, one of the princes with the highest status in Chong Hua. His ancestors have done meritorious deeds for generations, and his family's glory is untainted. But for you, he did almost everything he should and shouldn't have done. "
"It was the last stab you gave him that made him unable to protect you."
No one had ever said such things to Gu Mang. Even if someone had said it a few years ago, he wouldn't have believed it. But during this period of contact with Mo Xi, Gu Mang recalled the past, and Jiang Yexue's complaint center was in a mess.
Gu Mang's blue eyes flickered. "Why are you telling me this?"
Jiang Yexue said, "I was your comrade, and also his." He hesitated for a moment, and his gaze was complicated. "I don't want to see you hurt each other again."
Gu Mang was in a daze for a while, as if he was grasping for the last straw to explain his past mistakes. He said helplessly, "But he was also … also very fierce. He said I was dirty …"
"That's because you don't know that the thing he hates the most in his life is betrayal."
Gu Mang was stunned. "Why does he hate this the most?"
Jiang Yexue was silent for a moment, and said, "I just wanted to chat with you tonight, but …"
He paused, and sighed. "Forget it. I've already told you half of the story, so it's fine. Let me ask you, do you know how his father, Fu Lingjun, sacrificed himself? "
Gu Mang shook his head.
"It was because of a traitor."
Jiang Yexue said, and turned to look at him. "Fu Lingjun fought against the Liao Army, but unexpectedly, the deputy commander defected to the enemy and besieged the encampment. He was captured alive by the traitor in order to let the people evacuate. "
Gu Mang's eyes widened. "And then?"
"In order to please Lord Liao, the traitor killed Fu Lingjun with his own hands, cut off his head, took his spirit nucleus, and offered it to the enemy country. He was rewarded greatly for this — and then, like you, he was directly conferred the title of General."
Every word was bloody and pierced the heart. Gu Mang's hands trembled slightly.
"What's even more ironic is that in the letter that Fu Lingjun didn't have time to send, he actually praised the traitor for being loyal and righteous, and said that with such a brother, his family didn't have to worry." Jiang Yexue looked at his knees and sighed. "He also said, 'Qiyue has no clothes, and he shares the same robe with his son.'"
"…"
"Fu Lingjun gave his life to the traitor, but his brother didn't even leave a complete corpse for his family. When the coffin entered the city, Fu Lingjun's bones and blood were broken, and his limbs were separated. He died without a complete corpse. "Jiang Yexue turned to look at the pale Gu Mang.
"That year, Mo Xi was only seven years old."
Gu Mang seemed to be choked by a stone, and couldn't say a word.
"Gu Mang, now do you know why Lord Xi He hates betrayal so much?"
Jiang Yexue paused, and said.
"You did almost the same thing as his father's murderer."
Gu Mang stared at him blankly, and only felt a chill in his bones. "…"
"Ask yourself, think about it." Jiang Yexue sighed softly. "What kind of saint does he have to be to have no grudges against you?"
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