The war … might be coming to an end.
This diary might be my last diary.
I was born from a small group. I … don't know why I was born, who made me born, why I was born, I don't know any of that.
I only know that from the moment I can remember, I was forced to put on equipment, step onto the battlefield, and do my best to kill my enemies.
Our enemies … were our own kind, another group. There were such groups everywhere around here, and all the groups were constantly attacking each other.
This was a never-ending battle. At that time, I didn't think about this, and only thought about how to survive. At that time … it was really tough.
My group wasn't large, and was even weaker. However, our commander ignored this and kept ordering us to charge forward and fight against the groups that were stronger than us.
In the intense battle, I survived, but was captured by the enemy group. This group didn't care that I had killed their companions, and they made me put on equipment and fight for them.
Just like that, I stepped onto the battlefield again.
I didn't like the battlefield. If possible, I wanted to never fight, but that meant death, so I had to fight.
Once … and again.
I killed many abnormal creatures, and also countless of my own kind. At first, I didn't know what to do, but in the end, I slowly got used to it.
Why? I kept thinking about this question. Why did I have to kill so many of my own kind? Why did I have to fight?
The only reason I found was … to survive.
The group I was in also became larger and larger in the battle. We kept taking in prisoners, increasing our numbers, and sweeping through all the surrounding groups.
At that time, I finally understood how we were born. For the first time, I discovered that we had a 'gender,' which was why we could create offspring.
And these offspring would be like me, when they first came to this world. When they were still confused, they had to step onto the battlefield as new recruits.
However, they were slightly better than me. At least, they were born into a strong group.
I didn't want to have offspring, because I didn't want them to be like me … to have to fight from the moment they were born.
We continue to wipe out the weaker groups and feed on their corpses. We made ourselves stronger and stronger, and I survived countless battles. I learned how to distinguish the weak from the other side and quickly kill them. As for the strong ones, they had the same experience as me. I would leave it to the new recruits on my side.
If they let them win with numbers, many of the recruits might die, but it didn't matter as long as they could win.
As long as they could win … the war would end.
That's what I thought at the time. I kept killing the enemies, making the surrounding groups disappear one by one. In the end, we couldn't find any weak groups around us.
The war is over and we have won.
Because there are no more enemies, we don't need to fight anymore. I don't need to kill enemies anymore. I can finally have descendants …
Peace is coming …?
Indeed, the peace lasted … for a little while.
After a short period of time, the conflict began again. At first, it was because of the disappearance of the commander.
The Commander had disappeared. I was there at the time, and I was rather surprised at his sudden disappearance.
Of course, what surprised me even more were the adjutants of the commanders. They were not surprised that the commander had disappeared. Instead, they immediately began to fight for the commander's position.
At that time … I didn't understand what they were thinking at all. The other companions around me also started fighting because they were supporting different adjutants.
The battle became more and more intense. In the end, it caused the once huge group to … split up.
After that battle, the huge group split up into many small groups. They were scattered all over the place and maintained a strong hostility towards each other.
Everything was back to square one.
Because of that, I joined a small group. The companions of this group admired my rich battle experience and wanted to follow me. At the same time, there were a few … of the opposite sex who liked me.
But I didn't want to fight anymore … the reason of 'wanting to live' was no longer enough to stop me from giving up on the battle.
I pointed the weapon that had accompanied me through countless battles at myself. I wanted to end it all.
However, I couldn't take the next step. I had encountered countless dangers on the battlefield. This made me think that I was not afraid of death. In fact, it was the opposite.
The extreme fear of death made me give up on the idea of suicide. But … should I continue to fight?
The answer was … yes.
I wanted to continue fighting. Not because I wanted to fight, but because at that time, I felt … as if there was something … talking to me directly in my head.
It said … it wanted me to continue fighting. It wanted me to become the commander of this small group that had split up and lead them in battle.
As long as I fought to the last moment, I would be able to usher in true peace. After that, I would be able to live a life far away from battle forever.
At that moment, I saw my 'future'. Lying on a soft and comfortable bed, enjoying delicious food, watching the descendants play and chase each other …
That's the future I want!
I wanted to fight … because I had a new reason. I wanted that kind of future. I wanted to live that kind of peaceful life!
Thus, I wanted to kill everyone who dared to stand in my way … at that time, that was what I thought. This feeling was very strong and I didn't have any doubts.
Thus, I began to become the commander. I commanded our group to attack other groups and kill them all. Then, I took in those who surrendered, just like before.
That thing in my head … helped me all the time. It told me what to do, how to distribute the equipment, who should be the adjutant. It also told me not to communicate with the recruits outside of orders.
I … did as I was told. Speaking of which, at that time, I actually didn't have any doubts … about where our equipment came from.
I experienced countless battles again. Once again, I climbed step by step from a small and weak group to the peak.
But this time, I felt that I had become stronger and stronger. Because I no longer had the confusion from before, I had a clear goal.
In order to pursue this goal, I killed everyone who was once a comrade or not.
I became the commander of a large group. I once again saw the scene of peace because there was no opponent. I also knew that this wouldn't last for long.
This time, I knew that the commander who disappeared would be me. After I disappeared, the group that I led would probably start to fight like before.
Because, although the adjutants I chose were loyal to me, their relationship with each other was very bad.
They would have to go through another battle, but I didn't need to, so I didn't care about them.
I was going to welcome a peaceful future without war …
At that time, I felt the scenery around me change. After the change, what appeared before me was not the familiar rocky wasteland, but a narrow space.
The ground was made of metal, and the walls on both sides were filled with complicated mechanical structures.
I had never seen a place like this before, but I didn't find it strange. In fact, I could name many things.
I moved forward and wandered around this place filled with mechanical structures. I realized that this place was very large, but there was nothing … that I had seen in the 'vision of the future' before.
Although all of this was special, I didn't care at all. I just wanted to know, where was the future that I had fought for for so long? Where was this place?
When I thought that, it came to greet me.
It was the thing that had been communicating with me in my head. It represented this place, but that didn't mean that it was the ruler of this place. Rather …
It was the place itself.
This large mechanical environment had a 'will.' This will explained many things to me.
It said that it was the one who made us fight. It had been controlling our wars. Under its purposeful control, the war would never end.
Even if it ended accidentally, it would make the war start again.
I asked it why, but it didn't tell me.
It said that it would bring the commanders of the groups that won the war here, just like me.
Would those commanders be able to escape from the war?
It said … they could temporarily escape.
Then, it locked me up in a small space.
This space was made of metal. Like other places, there was no soft bed or playful offspring. Although there was a regular supply of food, it tasted terrible.
This was completely different from what I had seen back then …
I no longer knew … what to do.
However, I did not commit suicide. Instead, I continued to live.
It continued to tell me more things, telling me more things about it.
This will gave me the feeling that it was a 'god'. It had been controlling us and watching us suffer.
But then, I realized that it was not a 'god'. Instead, it was … something that we had created.
This mechanical environment, the equipment that we used for battle, and everything else … they were all created by us.
This shocked me. But it didn't give me any time to recover from my shock, because it then said … that I was going to fight.
My battle wasn't over yet. However, this time, I wasn't going to fight my own kind. The target of my battle was displayed in the 3D image before me.
It was a … white ball covered in fur. It was flying outside, killing my companions.
I didn't have the chance to ask what it was. I was about to step onto the battlefield.
This time, would I be able to survive? (~^~)
PS: Thank you ~ Lin Qingyi ~ for the tip ~
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