In the quiet hall, the grandmother and grandson were momentarily speechless. In the courtyard, the floral tea bought by the people from the capital was piled in a corner. The fragrance of the tea slowly seeped out, overshadowing the fragrance of the flowers in the courtyard. Among the flowering trees, a few yellow butterflies fluttered up and down. Occasionally, the crisp cries of fledglings could be heard from the trees.
"Go. A young phoenix will have its first cry. You've grown up. You need to see the world." The Countess continued with a smile, "But if you go to the capital alone, as a child, I'm afraid you'll suffer a lot. Can you bear it?"
Fan Xian knew what his grandmother was talking about. He smiled sweetly, "Second Aunt has been very good to me these past few years. She often sends things over. Don't worry, Grandmother."
Madam Dowager shook her head with a smile. She knew that this little fellow, who looked calm on the outside but was actually mischievous, definitely did not have such thoughts in his heart. She patted his head and was silent for a while. Suddenly, she sighed and said, "If … anything happens in the future, please bear with it for the sake of your father and me."
"Yes." Fan Xian smiled and nodded.
"Honestly speaking, I don't want to let you go to the capital," the Countess said seriously. "It's just that … you'll have to go to the capital eventually, so I have some things to tell you."
"Xian 'er, listen to Grandmother."
"Do you still remember Housekeeper Zhou from four years ago?" The Countess looked at him with a smile.
Fan Xian's heart skipped a beat. He didn't dare look his grandmother in the eye. After a while, he smiled bitterly and said, "Of course I remember."
With this reply, the grandmother and grandson finally broke through the layer of paper. The Countess said seriously, "You're a calm and intelligent child. There's nothing to worry about. But from what happened last time, I can see that you're still a bit too pure. "
Fan Xian sighed in his heart. "Isn't pure a compliment?"
As if guessing what he was thinking, the Countess narrowed her eyes and said coldly, "If you really want to go to the capital, you have to do one thing for me."
"What is it?" Fan Xian vaguely guessed.
"Be ruthless." The Countess seemed a bit tired. She leaned back against the armchair to rest. "This world seems to be peaceful, but if you're not ruthless enough, you'll suffer in the end."
Fan Xian was silent. In reality, he was not a nice guy. It was just that he had never had the opportunity to show his dark side in Danzhou. So, listening to the old woman's admonition, he knew that it was priceless advice.
The old woman half-closed her eyes and said, "Back then, your mother was very intelligent, but because she was too kind, she ended up …" She suddenly opened her eyes and stared at Fan Xian. Enunciating each word, she said, "I would rather harm others than let others harm me."
Fan Xian nodded his head vigorously.
…
…
"Go pack up. Your father is in a hurry. I'm afraid something really has happened in Jingdou." The Countess looked tenderly at the child who had spent 15 years with her. "I won't go to the capital. I'll stay in Danzhou. If … if you don't live well in the capital and someone wants to bully you, you can come back if you want."
"Okay," Fan Xian replied. He stood up and walked straight to his bedroom without saying anything else.
After entering the room, he silently sat on the bed and pulled up the quilt to wipe his face, messing up his hair. He muttered to himself in a low voice, "Damn, I almost cried. Grandma really knows how to stir up emotions."
— — —
Just as night fell, the lights in the room dimly lit. Fan Xian's face was expressionless. He picked up his pen and wrote a letter to his sister in Jingdou, telling her of his upcoming arrival. After he finished writing, he realized that the post horse probably wouldn't be much faster than the Count's carriage. Perhaps by the time she received the letter, he would already be in Jingdou. It didn't seem necessary.
But Fan Xian was a person who saved his energy. Since he had already written it, he casually sealed it in an envelope. He was about to tell Sisi to remember to send the letter tomorrow, but when he turned his head, he saw his maidservant Sisi propping up her chin thoughtfully and staring at him in a daze.
"Sisi, what are you thinking about?" He waved the envelope in front of the maidservant.
Sisi immediately woke up and said shyly, "Nothing. Is this a letter for the Lady? Then give it to me. "
Fan Xian pulled his hand back and looked at her curiously. "What's wrong?"
Sisi thought for a moment and finally gathered the courage to ask, "Young master, you're going to the capital. Are you very happy?"
Fan Xian sat up straight and looked at her with a smile. "Why do you suddenly ask this?"
"Young master, I've heard that the people in the capital are very bad." Sisi bit her lower lip, not knowing whether or not to say it. "And … after all, you don't have a high status. If you go to the capital government, you won't have a good time in front of the second wife."
Fan Xian laughed. "So you're worried about me. I'll just hide from her. Even if I don't have much of a future in the capital, I can still open a medical shop to support myself. It's fine as long as I don't stay in the Count's manor … I actually just want to go to the capital to have a look."
Sisi said, "Young master, you won't be mediocre for the rest of your life. You've read so many books. Next year, you'll take the imperial examinations. In the future, you'll be a high-ranking official and bring honor to your ancestors."
Seeing how serious she was, Fan Xian smiled and didn't respond. He didn't have any thoughts about bringing honor to his ancestors. Deep in his heart, he didn't have any feelings for his cheap father in the capital. This was too different from his relationship with his grandmother.
"Young master, why don't you want to take me to the capital?" This was what Sisi was truly worried about. She looked at Fan Xian pitifully. "The servant girls in the capital must all listen to the second wife. You don't have anyone you can rely on. What are you going to do?"
Fan Xian sighed. Sisi was older than him by two years. If she'd been in someone else's home, she would probably have been allowed to go out a long time ago. It was only because he had lived two lives that he secretly appeared much more mature and steady, which made Sisi feel that he was very reliable.
He looked at Sisi and said seriously, "It's because I don't know what the capital is like that I can't take you with me."
Sisi actually understood this, but she thought about how she and the young master would be far apart and would probably never see each other again. Her heart ached a little, and she quickly turned her face away and tidied up the things on the desk.
Fan Xian watched her busy figure and his heart was also gloomy, but he knew he couldn't say anything.
Perhaps the capital had good scenery and many interesting people and things, but it was also bound to have knives and spears in the light and arrows in the dark. He was willing to take some small risks to experience these things. Since he had a second life, there was no reason for him to spend the rest of his life alone in the tiny city of Danzhou. But he wasn't sure he could protect the people around him, so Sisi couldn't go with him.
At night, he quietly went to the grocery store.
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