Fan Xian smiled and looked at Sisi until she felt uncomfortable. Only then did he retract his smile and say seriously, "You'll have to ask my mother about this!" — Xiao Jinyu
(Serious reminder! The above sentence has nothing to do with the main text. It was purely because Xiao Jin's book review made me laugh so hard that I felt it had to be the headline. The main text is below.)
— — — —
A carriage rolled over the green stone pavement of Xinjiekou, making a squeaking sound. The winter was deep and cold, and the road was already covered in ice. The four-wheeled carriage didn't dare go too fast. The driver, Su Wenmao, was carefully and gently waving his whip. Around him, the swordsmen of the Sixth Bureau of the Overwatch Council, wearing boots, followed the carriage forward and looked around cautiously. The members of the Qinian Unit were scattered. They were disguised as common people in cotton-padded jackets and hidden in the crowd of onlookers on the street.
On the carriage was the emblem of the Fan family. It was square and round, with flowing gold and black borders. Fan Xian and Gao Da sat in the carriage. Two Tiger Guards sat across from them. Fan Xian's expression was calm. He said, "The arrangement is too big and too conspicuous."
Gao Da lifted a corner of the thick curtain from the carriage window and glanced at the street. He said calmly, "Assassins suddenly came from the mountains. Who knows if the capital is safe or not? The Emperor is very angry about this and has ordered me to ensure your safety."
His gaze swept across the street. There were not many people on the street, but the people in the houses and shops had already noticed the Fan family's carriage. They also guessed who was sitting in the carriage. They all cast strange gazes toward the carriage. The rumor had already spread for many days. The news that Fan Xian was the Emperor's illegitimate child had already been deeply rooted in the hearts of the people. Looking at the direction the carriage was heading, the Jingdou people knew that Sir Fan junior was going to enter the Palace. They couldn't help guessing. They didn't know whether or not Jingdou would provide them with even more shocking news.
The Royal Palace seemed very close.
The carriage came to a stop outside the square in front of the Palace. After the Hanging Temple incident, the Imperial Army's defenses were much tighter. Fan Xian got out of the carriage and accepted the large robe Su Wenmao handed him. He also took a walking stick and put it under his arm. Gao Da knew that Fan Xian's external injuries had long healed. He couldn't help looking at him with surprise.
Fan Xian didn't pay attention to his gaze. He led everyone toward the cool and majestic red and yellow Palace.
Before he reached the palace gate, the imperial guards in charge of guarding had already divided into a small team to receive him. They silently but thoughtfully shielded him from the wind and welcomed him into the palace gate. This kind of treatment had always only been afforded to the old and frail officials. Even the princes could not receive such generous treatment. Fan Xian could not help but frown, feeling a little confused.
He did not know that the First Prince had secretly instructed his subordinates. Although the Great Prince did not say anything, his calm attitude was enough to let all the generals of the Imperial Army know that the rumors had not harmed Fan Xian's position. Furthermore, the relationship between Commissioner Fan and the Great Prince had long recovered.
The person responsible for welcoming him at the Palace gates was Eunuch Hou, whom Fan Xian had first met when he entered the Palace. The two of them had long become familiar with each other. With a face full of flattery, Eunuch Hou said, "Young … Master Fan, it is fortunate that I woke up early today. Who would have thought you would come so early?"
Fan Xian jokingly scolded him and asked with a glimmer of confusion, "Last month, you said you were going to the Bureau of Xi Guan. The last few times I entered the Palace, it was Lao Yao who received me. Why are you the one coming out today?" Eunuch Hou had long been promoted to the position of Bureau of Xi Guan. He was in charge of medicine and funerals in the Palace. It was truly an important position. He was a popular figure in the Palace. Logically speaking, it should not be his turn to receive Fan Xian outside the Palace.
Eunuch Hou smiled and said, "Lao Yao has left the Palace to take care of business. The Emperor had me come today to take his place for a day."
Fan Xian nodded and followed him into the Palace. Along the way, they passed through the large palace garden, chatting here and there. A moment later, Fan Xian finally sighed and faintly said, "These days, I've gotten used to the gazes of others. You're the best, Lao Hou, to treat me like you always have."
Eunuch Hou shivered slightly. Immediately after, his heart warmed. He said in a fawning manner, "Look at what you're saying. In the future, young master Fan will only soar higher and higher. Of course, I have to serve you carefully."
Fan Xian didn't expose him. He chuckled and let it go. In reality, he did feel something. After everyone knew of his relationship with the royal family, their expressions would be somewhat unnatural. On the contrary, the eunuchs in the Palace did not seem to have much of a reaction.
He didn't know that the eunuchs in the Qing Royal Palace always maintained a balance between the princes. They did not dare to randomly vote for a master. They were not like officials. Once they voted for the wrong master, they could only die after the other side ascended the throne. On the contrary, there was a distance in their respect toward the princes. Furthermore, they served the Emperor daily. Other than the Crown Prince, they were not overly afraid of the other three princes.
Whether Fan Xian was a prince or not was not important to the eunuchs. On the contrary, it was his own position that was the reason the eunuchs curried favor with him.
…
…
They walked past a few familiar Palaces and finally arrived in front of the royal study. Eunuch Hou carefully spoke from outside the door. He then turned and gave Fan Xian a meaningful glance before retreating to the side.
After the door opened, Fan Xian walked in on his walking stick. Standing in front of the tall bookcase, he pretended to unnaturally place his walking stick to the side and bowed deeply toward the Emperor, who was reading memorials on the soft couch.
The Emperor didn't even raise his head. He grunted and then said, "Find a place to sit. We'll talk after I finish reading these."
How could he find a place to sit in the royal study? Hong Zhu, who was standing to the side with a horsetail whisk, was very clever. He understood the Emperor's meaning and quickly went to the back to bring out an embroidered stool and placed it by Fan Xian's side. Fan Xian smiled gratefully at the little eunuch and sat down. In his heart, he was thinking, Why is this child's pimples still so vigorous?
The Emperor lowered his head as if he did not see this scene. However, a glimmer of a smile flashed through his eyes as he looked at the memorials.
It was completely silent in the royal study. No one dared to speak. The eunuchs inside and outside the door did not make a single sound. This was not the first time Fan Xian had been alone with the Emperor and Fan Xian. After that rumor had spread, the two of them were alone in the same room. His heart always felt strangely nervous. His chest also felt a little itchy. He couldn't resist coughing. The coughing immediately reverberated throughout the royal study. It was incomparably clear and actually startled himself.
The Emperor raised his head and glanced at him. He didn't say anything and continued to read through memorials.
Fan Xian quickly sat up straight on the bench and began to quietly watch the Emperor's daily work. He knew that not many people had the opportunity to see this scene in front of him. It had been too long, and his mind wandered. He began to unconsciously observe the Emperor's appearance. Although the Emperor's head was slightly lowered, Fan Xian still found a few familiar shadows on his thin face. More accurately, they were places similar to his.
This was probably the so-called blood relationship.
The Emperor read through memorials for a long time. There were many memorials on the desk. His brows were sometimes furrowed angrily, sometimes relaxed happily, sometimes silent and gloomy, and sometimes excited. The territory of the Qing Kingdom was vast, with seven roads and 26 counties under its jurisdiction. There were countless provinces and counties. Using Jingdou as the center to govern the world was a difficult task. Just the number of memorials sent in from all over the country was as numerous as snowflakes. If it was an Emperor who followed the principle of ruling from above, perhaps he would give power to the cabinet and go sightseeing every day. However, the current Emperor of the Qing Kingdom was clearly not willing to be a muddle-headed ruler. He did not relinquish any of the kingdom's power. Thus, he did not hesitate to chase Prime Minister Lin Ruofu out of court and only set up the Hall of Governmental Affairs.
"This is practically self-torture." Fan Xian calmly watched the scene in front of him. A cold smile flashed through his heart. Being an Emperor was indeed not an interesting matter. In comparison, growing flowers like King Jing seemed to be a pretty good choice.
The sun gradually moved to the middle of the sky. After the sunlight shone down through the layers of cold clouds, it had been frozen until it lost all its heat. The people in the Palace seemed to have forgotten the time. The Emperor finally finished his morning edits and closed the last memorial. He closed his eyes and slowly rested his spirit. In the end, he even stretched.
The eunuchs filed in. Towels, calming tea, pastries, and incense began to be applied to the Emperor's body and stomach. Fan Xian noticed that the towels did not give off a sliver of cold air in this winter. He furrowed his brows and asked, "Your Majesty … is this cold?"
The Emperor made a sound of acknowledgement and took the towel to rub his face forcefully. Indistinctly, he said, "It's cold to the bone. It can wake the spirit."
Fan Xian thought for a bit and finally said, "Your Majesty, try a hot towel. It's good for the body."
The Emperor was slightly surprised. He then smiled and said, "A hot towel is too warm and comfortable. I'm afraid I'll fall asleep."
Fan Xian also smiled. "Use a hot one. The hotter the better." He suddenly seemed to choke. As he coughed, he hurriedly waved his hand and said, "Of course, be careful not to burn yourself."
The Emperor suddenly revealed a meaningful smile. Glancing at him, he said, "Not bad, you appear relatively calm."
Fan Xian was speechless.
The Emperor's gaze moved to the walking stick behind Fan Xian. He couldn't help but sigh in his heart. "This child is as stubborn as his mother … he wants to purposely let me see that he is acting obedient. He wants me to reprimand him and firm his heart. Does he think I don't understand?"
Thinking of this, the Emperor remembered more and more how good someone had been in the past. He also found that Fan Xian was a good son who did not have any improper thoughts. On the contrary, he was somewhat aloof. He rose and walked out of the royal study, indicating for Fan Xian to follow him. Fan Xian quickly went to take the walking stick. The Emperor smiled and said, "If I had known that your injuries were almost healed, why did you act pitiful in front of me?"
Although it was pointed out, there was no anger on the Emperor's face. Fan Xian was startled at just the right time. It was as if he had not expected the Emperor to not reprimand him. Immediately after, he chuckled and tossed the walking stick to the side, following the Emperor out.
Fan Xian won the first psychological confrontation between Fan Xian and his so-called "father."
— — —
Following the long eaves of the Palace toward the northwest, the Palace buildings gradually became sparse, leaving behind the grand buildings of Hanguang Palace and Taiji Palace. Along the way, all the serving girls and eunuchs they saw humbly lowered their heads and gave way. Behind the Emperor and Fan Xian, there was only Hong Zhu, the little eunuch. Gradually, as they walked, even the serving girls and eunuchs rarely appeared. The Winter Garden was incomparably quiet. Occasionally, there was snow on the fake mountains. There were no longer any sounds of birds or insects. There was only a faint silence.
Fan Xian knew where they were going, so he was silent. The Emperor seemed to be in a strange mood and did not say anything. It was not until even the Cold Palace had disappeared and the Palace buildings appeared to be in a dilapidated state that the Emperor stopped his steps. At this moment, there was a quiet little courtyard in front of them. The courtyard was not large. Inside, there was only a two-story wooden building. The building was a bit old. It had probably not been repaired in many years.
Following the Emperor up the steps and entering, Fan Xian began to feel nervous. He took a deep breath.
The outside of the little building was old and broken, but the inside was incomparably clean. There was not a speck of dust on it. Someone had probably cleaned it all year round.
Going up to the second floor, in the main hall, the Emperor finally sighed and walked out of the building. Looking at the garden across the balcony, he was silent for a long time. The corner of the Royal Palace facing the balcony was already the most isolated and quiet place in the Royal Palace. The flowers and plants in the garden were not cared for and grew wildly on their own. Then, they were bullied by the autumn wind, cold dew, and wild snow and collapsed to the ground. They looked like countless corpses that had been killed, pale yellow and white.
In the distance, the corner tower of Huayang Sect could faintly be seen.
Fan Xian stood silently behind the Emperor. It was not good for him to speak, but he had already swept his gaze around the hall. He did not see the portrait he was thinking of.
It was like the little eunuch Hong Zhu was performing a magic trick. He brought out boiling water from somewhere in the little building and made tea. He respectfully placed it on the table and then obediently went downstairs, not daring to wait at the side.
…
…
"Earlier, I told you to wait in the royal study." The Emperor's face was facing the outside of the railing. His hands gripped the railing firmly and powerfully. There was no fluctuation in his voice. "I wanted to tell you that a ruler has a ruler's way."
Fan Xian remained silent.
"As the ruler of a country, I must consider the state and the people under heaven," the Emperor said slowly. The Emperor said slowly, his eyes staring into the distance. "Being an Emperor is not an easy job … Your mother once said that. So, sometimes, I must give up some things, even some things that are very valuable, and leave you in Danzhou for 16 years. Don't blame me. "
Fan Xian had waited for this day for a long time and had made solid mental preparations. Suddenly hearing these words, he still couldn't stop a chill from traveling up his neck and toward his head. He was so shocked that he didn't know what to say. After a moment of silence, he suddenly bit his lower lip and replied in a clear voice, "I don't know what Your Majesty means by these words."
Fan Xian's reaction seemed to have long been within the Emperor's expectations. He smiled self-mockingly and didn't turn his head. However, his tone became even gentler. "Including your brothers, even if the people under heaven have resentment toward me, I'm afraid no one would dare to say it to my face or show it. An Zhi, you indeed have some of your mother's legacy."
Fan Xian forcefully straightened his neck and stubbornly didn't say a word.
"You don't know what I mean by these words?" The Emperor turned around. His light yellow robes appeared even more noble by the railing of the winter building. Slowly, he said, "What I mean is, you are my son."
…
…
Fan Xian was silent. After a long time, he suddenly smiled. He couldn't help but laugh. It was a silent laugh. There was an indescribable bitterness, grief, and indignation in his laughter. After a long time, he slowly withdrew the smile on his face. For a moment, he was at a loss. He had forgotten earlier, from the moment he entered the Palace, whether he was acting according to plan or if he had completely taken the role of the Emperor's illegitimate child. It was difficult for him to get out of the act.
He bowed deeply toward the Emperor but still wouldn't say anything.
The Emperor sighed in his heart. He was completely fooled by the emotions Fan Xian displayed. Faintly, he said, "I originally didn't want to acknowledge the rumors in Jingdou, but in the end, I will. An Zhi, in the end, you are my flesh and blood."
The Emperor walked closer to him and looked at the unique determination and stubbornness on the face of this beautiful young man in front of him. An expression of pity appeared on his face and was immediately hidden. He didn't demand that Fan Xian answer. Instead, he said to himself, "You will be 18 next month."
Fan Xian abruptly raised his head. He wanted to speak but then stopped. A moment later, he lightly said, "I … don't know when I was born."
These words pierced into the Emperor's heart. It made this Emperor, whose heart had always been ice-cold, finally feel a sense of guilt. He thought for a moment and then slowly said, "The 18th of the first month."
Fan Xian was slightly surprised. Shortly after, he smiled bitterly and sighed. "I didn't know I was born 18 until I was 18."
The Emperor smiled warmly. The more he looked at the child in front of him, the more he liked him. Unconsciously, he said, "To be able to raise you into such a sensible child in the countryside, it must have been very hard on your mother in Danzhou. One day, I will also go to Danzhou to visit her … An Zhi, how is her health recently?"
Fan Xian lowered his head in silence for a moment. No one knew what he was thinking. Finally, he opened his mouth. "Grandmother's health is very good. I … I often communicate with Danzhou."
"Oh." Hearing that he was finally no longer calling himself an official, the Emperor's heart warmed. He smiled comfortingly and began to gently ask about Fan Xian's childhood.
The conversation had a prelude. Fan Xian seemed to have adapted to the new relationship between ruler and official. He began to talk about his childhood days to the Emperor in front of him.
…
…
Everyone, please read the following rhyme aloud.
Fan Xian was the Emperor's son. At first, the Emperor did not know that Fan Xian knew that Fan Xian was the Emperor's son. Now, the Emperor knew that Fan Xian guessed that Fan Xian was the Emperor's son. At first, Fan Xian wanted the Emperor not to know that he knew. Now, he wanted the Emperor to guess that he just knew but didn't want to know. Thus, the Emperor did not know Fan Xian, but Fan Xian knew the Emperor. The Emperor thought of Fan Xian as his son, but Fan Xian did not think of himself as his son.
This was a problem of the mind, and it was also a psychological problem. From the first step he took into the Palace, Fan Xian had been using this to retreat step by step and attack step by step.
It finally quieted upstairs. This pair of "father and son", each with their own ulterior motives, sat apart, drinking tea and chatting. Although Fan Xian still did not speak, his expression had already calmed. His conversation with the Emperor was no longer restricted to the memorials between ruler and official. He could talk about the gossip outside the Palace, his life these years in Danzhou, and the small matters of his family.
Thus, the Emperor began to revel in this kind of atmosphere. This was exactly what Fan Xian needed.
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