"Peace is so nice."
I sat in a tea house in a public square and lightly sipped on some fragrant tea. I looked at the peaceful winter scenery before me. Since when did I have such a happy retired life?
Ever since I returned to Diffindor, I was quite satisfied with my peaceful daily life. I didn't need to go to work, nor did I need to plan all those messy things. All I needed to do was sit and watch the sun rise and set. It was like a beautiful dream.
* Boom! *
Yep, it seemed that Glina had arrived to participate in the celebration. So what if there was a slight explosion? Everyone had their own hobbies, and we needed to respect everyone's freedom.
"Capture that bastard! He actually dared to go even further than before!"
The group of naked men running past me was nothing. I had experienced it so many times in Sulfur Mountain City that I had long since gotten used to it. The new Town Security squad seemed to have gotten used to it as well, but …
"I don't care about anyone else, but if the highest-ranking bishop says anything, Wumianzhe's reputation will be affected as well. It seems that I need to tell Lilith that during the celebration, that Tauren is to be imprisoned until he dies. Now that all the envoys have arrived, I can't let him continue to embarrass himself."
How could such a small matter possibly stop me from continuing to laze around … I was in a good mood to relax. After doing my best to erase the scene from my memory, I poured myself another cup of tea and slowly enjoyed my peaceful life.
And then, a group of naked men with wings floated past in the sky …
* Pu! *
I looked at Eaglestorm and his brethren in a daze. Part of the transformation was a high-level Druil technique. Weren't there more and more people who knew how to do this? When I looked closely, I discovered that there were actually quite a few Black Winged people among them. They were Kamdiran's minions.
"I heard that Eaglestorm's Druil Sect has been very successful recently. Last time I saw the fairies' report, they actually managed to snatch two seats at the Druil's Voice of Nature gathering and even had the right to speak. Eaglestorm is even hailed as the 'Most Outstanding Theoretical Reformer' of the current generation. As expected, is there something wrong with the Druil's head? If this sect continues to expand, there will only be more and more Winged people who don't wear clothes, and that's basically mental pollution … Let the Town Security know. Hmm, you can also be targets for the air defense. Don't thank me, everyone has a responsibility to fight cults. Please call me X-Blade."
"I'm selling medicine, I'm selling secret alchemy potions. Whether it's for treatment or health, they're all effective. Dozens of Gold-ranked Alchemists worked together to create this potion. All the common potions were available, and they were sold at half price! What are you waiting for? As long as you can think of it, we have it here. Sex change agent? Super hair tonic? Peerless Macho Blue Potion? Take a good look, it's the Safety Card. It's absolutely effective, absolutely safe! "
I looked at the gnome and his cart walking past me, as well as the familiar "Safety Card" from the Beyar Brothers. Most importantly, I even saw the alchemy symbol of the "Miracle Alchemist" Olivia. That was why, for the sake of Diffindor's citizens' safety and the next year's health and civilization evaluation, I unhesitatingly lowered my head and began writing a second letter of criticism.
What? Why would someone with the symbol of the "Miracle Alchemist" have to be reported and banned? Olivia currently didn't have such a title. Her current title was "Random Alchemist". The ingredients of her potions were random, their effects were random, and their targets were random. A single batch of alchemy products could have more than ten different effects. Who would dare to touch such a thing?
"… Mom, why doesn't that gnome have any fur?"
"Don't look. Hurry up and leave."
Alright then, I take back what I just said. At the very least, this acolyte had quite the professional ethics. At the very least, she used herself to test out the potion. Although this hair removal potion's effects were rather strong, it was indeed effective, wasn't it?
Although having fur all over their bodies was basically the symbol of gnomes, and a hairless gnome was even more ridiculous than a hairless husky, her dedication was still commendable.
"… I clearly drank a growth potion. As expected, growth potions and advertisements can't be trusted."
Even though Olivia's mutterings were so close to me, I still added another case to my letter of criticism.
I knew that this wasn't because Olivia wasn't skilled enough. In fact, it was the opposite. It was because she had too many ideas. She always liked to improve potion recipes and create new potion recipes. The end result was that many of these dangerous potions were produced.
Normally speaking, such potions wouldn't be sold to outsiders. However, it was a pity that Olivia's teacher, Yingou Beyar, was a pure gnome. How could gnomes possibly waste such precious ingredients?
"Roland!? Oh, I'm sorry, I mistook you for someone else. "
The person who suddenly walked by was a witch who was carrying a pot of unknown ingredients. Recently, she seemed to have become addicted to cooking. Since I had finally returned to the mortal plane, where there were so many ingredients, how could I possibly take the initiative to become the Food God?
"Sister, are you looking for His Highness Roland? I saw that he went to the west of the city on horseback. He's probably out of the city. "
At this moment, I couldn't help but secretly rejoice at my own foresight. In order to successfully slack off … and quietly become a handsome man, I took off the ring that lied about my age and used my true appearance to enjoy my vacation.
"Tsk, he escaped again. I clearly sensed that he was nearby … Eh? Little brother, did you eat lunch? "
"I did! I'm already full since early in the morning. "
There were actually tentacles and eyeballs among the pot of unknown ingredients. At this time, anyone who wasn't an idiot would decisively refuse and furiously shake their head. However …
"That's perfect. I'm not afraid of vomiting on an empty stomach. Little brother, just treat it as my experiment … Try the lunch that I personally made. I spent so much time making it. It would be such a pity to waste it. "
I chuckled and then turned around to run … However, the vines beneath my feet instantly hung me up. She had actually long since predicted that I would run away.
Alright then, under the pressure of this terrifying witch and being tied up, in order to not expose my identity, my achievement as the God of Food increased by one. It was quite rare for me to be able to cook so much without dying every time.
"Urgh! Seafood and tangerine flavor. It's slightly stronger than last time's burnt rubber flavor, but it's limited. It's always different every time. How creative. "
But the strange thing was that even though Amelia clearly didn't capture her main target, she actually happily watched me eat after I finished eating. Then, she hummed a song as she cleaned up the dishes.
"In order to conquer a man, you must first conquer his stomach. Little brother, what do you think? Is it delicious? "
Obviously, her understanding of this classical maxim was quite a bit off. If "conquer" referred to killing and surrendering, then I felt that she had already achieved her goal. At the very least, my stomach had raised the white flag countless times already. All that was left was to give it a final cut.
"Beautiful sister, if I were your target, I would have already been completely 'conquered' by your cooking. Next time, please directly give it to your target. Don't waste it on someone else. "
This wasn't because I wanted to make another achievement, nor was it because I didn't want to see Amelia's hard work go to waste. I simply didn't want to see anyone die. Even I, who had an inhuman physique, could be made half dead. If anyone else ate it, they would probably be poisoned and die.
It seemed that my sarcastic suggestion was a bit too tactful, as Amelia actually smiled and nodded. It was evident that she was in a good mood.
"Yep, I won't give it to anyone else."
Alright then, I bid farewell to this "sister" who was preparing to go to another dimension to collect ingredients for dinner. I seriously considered for several dozen seconds whether I should continue hiding like this or actually leave the city to seek refuge. However, I met with a new problem.
Yet another group of royal Knight ran past me. Their eyes were constantly scanning the crowd, obviously searching for someone.
"You still haven't found His Highness?"
"Lady Kelly said that if we still can't find His Highness today, there's no need for us to go back. We'll have to go around the city for a 500-kilometer training."
"Envoys from various countries are here. So many major figures want to see His Highness Roland. Just what does His Highness Roland mean by this?"
"The military also said that His Highness Roland has to personally discuss and prepare for the military parade. If we still can't find His Highness Roland, we're going to quit."
Upon hearing this, I took out a special disguise item — a mystical pair of black-rimmed glasses. As long as I wore these glasses, I would be able to ignore anyone's face that was so close to me … Fine then, I was just making things up. I was just curious as to how it was possible for there to be so many misunderstandings in those epic stories. Lovers would simply wear a veil and a hat, yet no one would be able to recognize each other, and they would end up killing each other.
But right now, these traditional black-rimmed glasses were doubtlessly double insurance. And in order to increase my persuasiveness, I naturally couldn't miss out on those childish lollipops. But the strange thing was that when I put on the glasses and took out the lollipops, those Knight knights actually started paying attention to me.
"Lady Eliza said that His Highness Roland might be disguised as a child. If you meet someone who notices you, he'll suddenly change his appearance, such as wearing a hat or wearing glasses …"
"She also said that 'old fellows like to use lollipops to pretend to be young.' If you see someone who's eleven or twelve years old still chewing on a lollipop, it should be him."
What else could I say? I didn't say anything else as I turned around and ran.
Alright then, as soon as I ran, even if there wasn't a problem, it became a problem. Those newbie Knight knights naturally chased after me, and as they chased after me, I ran into an empty alleyway.
About ten seconds later, I emerged from the entrance of the alleyway with a pile of metal cans lying on the ground behind me.
"Did you really think that I would be able to eat you? Before you go fishing, you should first think about how much weight your fishing rod can take. Didn't she tell you to be careful of your anger? "
"Roland huh?"
I couldn't help but sigh. Why am I always getting exposed? It seems like this disguise is completely useless. However, just as I was about to use my Memory Erasing Kick again, I saw a nightmarish figure.
"Little Rolo!"
Alright, isn't the one who suddenly pounced over the 'Fierce Dog' Momo who had just finished her mission to settle down the refugees? Of course, there was also Diana who was looking at me with a shocked expression.
What else could I say? I continued running.
"I've had enough! I don't want to do anything before my birthday. No one can stop me from taking a vacation! "
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