Early in the morning, the warm sunlight shone through the red brick and white tile walls and into the intensive care ward of St. Edlund Hospital.
After pulling open the curtains and windows, fresh air came in, diluting the slightly uncomfortable alcohol disinfectant smell. An Xin, who was lying on the hospital bed, leaned against the pillow and ate the fried dough sticks and soy milk that her friend brought for breakfast. She let out a sigh of satisfaction.
"As expected, the traditional breakfast in our country tastes better."
Ceng Rui, who was sitting on a chair, looked up and said, "The breakfast stall is not far from the hospital. Haven't you eaten much?"
The girl stuck out her tongue and said, "The doctors and nurses are very strict with me, and I've been in surgery for the past few days … They said that my body doesn't allow me to eat random things."
When she said the word 'messy', the girl deliberately made quotation marks with her hand, as if she was complaining about the hospital's strict requirements.
Ceng Rui shook his head.
"This kind of thing …"
"Only you can say it in such a relaxed tone."
Right now, there were only the two of them in the ward. The young lady facing him did not mind at all and did not hide her real life situation in Manchester.
An Xin shrugged on the bed and smiled.
"Anyway, it's the truth and nothing can change it. Instead of saying it with a frown, it's better to say it in a relaxed tone so that people will feel more at ease, right?"
Ceng Rui sighed helplessly, "Not really …"
Yes.
Because the truth and facts were too heavy. Even if you mentioned it in a relaxed tone, people would never be able to deceive themselves into thinking that it was a simple matter.
The girl on the sickbed took another bite of the soft and crispy fried dough stick, and then took a sip of the steaming hot soy milk.
"Anyway, that's it."
"Remember to keep it a secret for me. I'm already trying my best to pretend that I'm fine. I can't let that idiot see through me."
Speaking of "that idiot", there was no other candidate.
Ceng Rui smiled bitterly, "I know, I know … I'll help you hide it from him. But I don't think this is a suitable choice."
The girl paused in the middle of eating and put down the youtiao. She looked up at her friend.
"Don't you think I should hide it from him?"
Ceng Rui was silent for a moment, but he shook his head and did not answer the question directly.
"How long do you want to hide it?"
"Also, even if everyone helps, can they really keep it a secret?"
It seemed that what had happened in the past few days was enough to serve as a warning.
Naturally, it was persuasive enough.
"It's a good thing that you got through the danger smoothly this time and recovered fast enough to prevent things from deteriorating to a situation that is even more irreparable. But even so, you can see that guy has directly rushed to Manchester City from the country regardless of anyone's dissuasion."
"What if …"
"I mean, what if something happens that you can't control in the future? What should you do?"
Ceng Rui frowned and looked at An Xin on the bed.
"Or, do you really think that Lin Feng has completely accepted everything you said so far, and he doesn't have any doubts at all?"
It was a question that hit the nail on the head.
This time, it was An Xin's turn to fall into silence.
After a long while, he finally saw the girl lower her head, and the corners of her lips curled up into a bitter smile.
"I know …"
"Ah Zeng, all the reasons you said, including the reasons that other people don't want to say in front of me."
"I know all of them."
"But … what else can I do?"
As she spoke, she raised her head and looked at her friend in front of her calmly and seriously.
"I don't have any other better way."
"Or do you think that if you tell Lin Feng now, it will have any substantial effect and impact on everything?"
Ceng Rui was speechless.
But An Xin shook her head and continued, "There won't be any substantial effect. At most, that idiot will be more worried and uncomfortable because he knows the truth, and he might not even be able to live a good life. Other than that, nothing else will change."
Yes.
A lot of things from an emotional point of view may make people want to make a variety of other choices, as if it would have some effect; but in fact, from the coldest and cruelest point of view of reality, all emotional choices were actually meaningless.
The illness of a patient would not get better just because more people knew about it, even the person closest to him.
Since telling the truth would only bring more pain to the person closest to him …
Then there was no need to tell him.
It sounded very cruel.
But this was the reality.
"No." Ceng Rui shook his head forcefully, frowning as he looked at An Xin who was lying on the sickbed, "Not only that, there are still benefits —"
An Xin raised an eyebrow, "Oh? What kind of benefits are they? "
Her tone seemed to be a little careless.
Ceng Rui looked straight into An Xin's eyes and gave his answer, word by word.
"You don't need to hide it from him.
"This has always been the greatest benefit."
The atmosphere in the ward seemed to suddenly become quiet, to the point where even a pin drop could be heard.
Without giving the stunned girl a chance to react, Ceng Rui looked at her and continued, "At least, you don't have to bear the psychological burden of hiding the truth from the people closest to you at the same time you're suffering from your illness."
"At least, when you are weak and need someone to talk to, you don't need to talk to 'ordinary' friends like us. You can talk to someone you really want to talk to."
"At least, you can get more encouragement and courage from that person."
"At least —"
At this point, Ceng Rui paused and slowly said the last sentence.
"When you don't need to hide it from that person, you are not alone anymore."
The air was quiet.
There was only the sound of the curtains being gently blown by the breeze.
The girl on the sickbed seemed to be trying hard to squeeze out a smile and say something like "I have you guys here, how am I alone?" to ease the atmosphere, but in the end, she couldn't say it.
She just lowered her head.
A rather gloomy voice came from between the girl's loose hair.
"But, I don't want him to be sad because of me."
Ceng Rui took a deep breath and let out a long sigh.
"But then you have to bear everything by yourself, it's too tiring —"
"It's already like this, can't you think about yourself for once?"
"Once is enough."
An Xin raised her head again and squeezed out a smile to look at Ceng Rui.
"Sigh —"
"It seems like I really can't do it."
Ceng Rui's eyelids twitched slightly as if he was trying to control his emotions. He took a few deep breaths, but in the end, he still gritted his teeth and said:
"I don't know why."
"But now … for the first time in history … I really want to hit someone."
The girl looked sad: "Ceng, are you angry with me?"
Ceng Rui shook his head and said coldly: "I'm talking about that guy."
*****
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